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Poetry Magnum Opus
badger11

After the fall

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badger11

An angel sips a black coffee

as she observes the world

through a stained-glass window.

Occasionally she lights a cigarette

as she unloads another basket

of soiled souls into the machine.

Her breast is not for man to suckle dream.

 

She sets the dial to synthetic white

and through the oval glass

observes the cleansing, the spinning

out of night. Is the world so soiled

with sin? With a listless grin

she sips a glass of homemade gin.

 

The tear tap is tight, the steam a final breath,

the dial she sets to max.

Humming a hymn an angel meanders

an iron over all the souls

wrinkled with dream.

She spends eternity at the launderette,

sipping black coffee, or juniper gin,

dreaming of those garden days

without original sin.

Edited by badger11

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Larsen M. Callirhoe

excellent poem badge,

 

 

this is multilayered and transcends what modern poetry is. you are making the bar hard to ascertain with a write like this. wow badger. i have been going thru all my writings finely tuning editing them and i am laughing at how stupid lots of it was even though there was some good lines in each one lol. but i have improved my craft a lot in the last two years. i am being less impatient and taken a lot more time editing before posting. i am taken out some of the repetiveness. i agree with you that less words is definitely better. i till make some mistakes in spelling or tenses but my grammar syntax and sentence structuring has been corrected completely. i suppose or reckon since i didn''t study hard in most of my classes in school when i was in school 20 to 25 years ago is the reason why i don't spell well now. and since my head injury in august 12 1996 i had lost my skills to write until 2003 or 2004. writing for me is still a work in progress. in 1992 and 1993 i was one of the first 10,000 prodigy users. hard to believe it is pretty much nothing now. i was one of the first people on the net christmas 1991. i was on philosophy sites, poetry forums, and i talked to young females who believed like wiccans. i didn't use a large vocabulary tho i could speak a large vocabulary while writing to them. unfortunately aol then was called american on line. of course money was a big factor. the internet service providers provided you with so much cool stuff back then. most stuff on the net was free back then. now articles written you have to pay for. i know how society has changed that way cause stuff definittely cost money but hey everything cost beteen 20 to 400 dollars for a year to 3 year service agreement lol. internet has changed much. getting back to this story has to go with me reading so much stuff and learning so much stuff about writing, an religion that i have written thesis papers on religion. it earned me honorary degrees a docotrate in religion and a masters in literature lol. the college i attended read so many of my postings on the internet in the mid 2000's preteens lol. they have probably rea like a 1000 of my stories and poems. i also earned several other honorary degrees. they put that i graduated in winter of 1995. i hd seven more classes to finish at the time to earn a associates degree. i was attending 4 classes when i dropped out. when i went to reapply in 1996 january they told me i needed to take 3 classes om not dropping classes lol. i dropped like half the classes i enrolled in. but that was another life lol.

 

well trhis poe nreally opened up a can of worms.

 

 

victor


Larsen M. Callirhoe

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badger11

That is quite a response Victor. I guess poems do open doors to the past and re-awaken hopes for the future.

 

many thanks

 

badge

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tonyv

The angel goes about the task(s) in a matter-of-fact manner and seems mostly unaffected (other than his musings on and the mechanical performance of the task at hand) by the very existence of sin. Curiously absent is any mention of the blood of the Lamb. Perhaps it's in the soap compartment?

 

Tony


Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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badger11
Curiously absent is any mention of the blood of the Lamb.

 

She's a little squeamish about such things, I suspect she is a vegan!

 

cheers

 

badge

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David W. Parsley

Yeesh, and I thought my job was hard. An enjoyable read.

 

- Dave

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badger11

Cheers Dave. Suffering is relative I guess.

 

badge

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Larsen M. Callirhoe

hey reread this always looking for a different angle as tony so put it. lol you really have people thinking especially with how you tassled your metaphors, similies etc... with a modern twist. yes it is always a pretty face that sits in a trailer park environment. will fortune ever find its way to her? maybe it is stuff like that that others only dream of, while we think it is a wretched existence. perhaps a coin toss is the best life will ever offfer us. in parts of Africa and south america life is still primitive of sorts compared to the techno technoloy type world we exist or live in. yes gentics bless some and frowns on others. phue-wy...

 

i reenrolled into school. i am going for masters in Art and Science school for a degree in Web design, Publishing, and Businesss. the degree is called "Computer Technology Information" or something like that lol. only reason i mention education in either of these posts is because if she was educated differently maybe she would hve a different outcome. but this is either a fabricated story or a story you painted from live events. either way this is my favorite poem by you.

 

the classes i take will be elective heavy filled with european literature and history of the middle-age era mostly of course. i'm interested. in opera, spansih, portiguese, english, anglo-saxon, germain or germatic type poetry and literature, french, ukrainian, russian, prussian, german, italain, austrain, hungrian, cezcholoslavakain, poetry, literature, and oprea from the 1033till 1799 era. i also want to take a class on the renessiance painters. who they all are and the history o like the top 20 painters from van gogh to to pacaso etc.. and a glass on famous painters. i am working on one paintiong. it is called "roses at the cross" myy sppirit guides tell me it will take me about six and a half years to paint up to three copies and the latter being the best of the three lol.


Larsen M. Callirhoe

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badger11

hey reread this always looking for a different angle as tony so put it. lol you really have people thinking especially with how you tassled your metaphors, similies etc... with a modern twist. yes it is always a pretty face that sits in a trailer park environment. will fortune ever find its way to her? maybe it is stuff like that that others only dream of, while we think it is a wretched existence. perhaps a coin toss is the best life will ever offfer us. in parts of Africa and south america life is still primitive of sorts compared to the techno technoloy type world we exist or live in. yes gentics bless some and frowns on others. phue-wy...

 

 

 

 

an intuitive, poetic response victor - almost stream of consciousness - but I followed the thread and appreciate the sensitivity.

 

many thanks

 

badge

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Benjamin

“Humming a hymn, an angel meanders an iron over all the souls wrinkled with dream.”Lovely lines that remind me of what my mother once said. “Nobody realizes what I do until I cease doing it!” :smile: Ben.

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badger11

Thank you Ben. The chores of mothers are so easily taken for granted - always remembered in their absence!

 

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