Freedom

[eclipse]

The sun's unswerving protocol allows me

to utilise tools, my senses. I am free to

select fruit in the forest of the moon's

heartbeats.

 

I cannot silence echoes of the angel

that danced on my mother's womb

as it rained days, then nights, my

finite allocation.

 

I don't know if I have a choice to return,

like the eternally recurring bullet returning

to it's gun, but when I die do I have the power

to make the universe recede to a hole the

size of a fingertip or an eye?,will the seasons

cry as they strip away my freedom

[JoelJosol]

After reading your poem and returning to the title, I exercised my freedom whether to enjoy the poem as a collection of words, rhythms and sounds or to go beyond it and try to make sense of it. 

Since I already enjoyed it just going through it, I gave myself the freedom to look at the symbols of your poem and see if there is more to it.

The first symbol is the "sun", followed by the speaker's "senses". Next is the "fruit", "angel", "womb" and "allocation". In my own world, I associate that with the mortality of life. Then, the speaker switched to a new symbol, "bullet" and "gun". Instead of the word "death", the speaker chose the action word "die". The cycle of life through these symbols are complete. 

The other layer is the concept of effecting change across these symbols. The speaker used "allows me", "I am free to select", "I cannot silence" - expressions of control. But, in the end, the speaker is not sure if he has one.

Thanks anyway for the journey, eclipse. 

[tonyv]

A remarkably fluid read, Barry. Perhaps end it in L13 after "eye" (drop the rest of L13&L14)?

Tony