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tonyv

Telescope (Is this a haibun?)

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tonyv

-----Grass is supposed to be two feet tall. Here, in America, lifetimes are squandered trimming it down to two inches tall.

-----She made a material misrepresentation of fact when (in her poem) she said that the stars are cold. They're not; they're hot.

------Polaris is at the top,
σ Octantis -- dim in the distance.
---The roof of the van is cold.
__________________________________________

polaris -- the northern pole star

σ Octantis


Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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goldenlangur

Hi Tony,

 

Terse prose and a haiku that extends it, not necessarily elaborating it but opening it up, certainly makes for haibun :) Aleksandra is absolutely spot-on.

 

I too like how the humble grass takes on a significance in this haibun:

Grass is supposed to be two feet tall. Here, in America, lifetimes are squandered trimming it down to two inches tall.

 

Her misrepresentation of the stars seems to evoke a misrepresentation of a more personal nature, giving the haibun a certain poignancy.

 

 

Thank you.

Edited by goldenlangur

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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