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Poetry Magnum Opus

David W. Parsley

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About David W. Parsley

  • Birthday 04/03/1958

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    Rancho Palos Verdes, California, USA
  • Interests
    Literature, philosophy, music, science, religion, God, space exploration, camping, hiking, history, women and feminism, politics, economics, engineering, enterprise and program management, higher mathematics, theology, epistemology, ethics, ontology, cosmology, stock market, art, history, God again, ballet, poets, poems, poetic forms, informal asthetics, film. And other stuff.

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  1. Robert Burns dreamscape poem

    Hi Barry, interesting piece, though I like "Quills" more. Strong images. I have diction issues: "mask" appears near end of stanza 1, then near start of stanza 2. Feels repetitive. "incantation" appears twice in the poem, neither time organically, feels forced. plurality mis-match between "selves" and "grain" "incandescence" feels forced Hope that helps. I know how it feels to want more comments on one's poem. - Dave
  2. Call From Concert

    That is absolutely anguishing. So sorry to hear. - David
  3. Out of Sync

    Interesting use of terza rima, Tinker, introducing an irregular metric length in the lines. Clever treatment of indian summer. Query: do you think the first line would work better without "hot"? It seems redundant, though it does leaden the rhythm to bring the sensation of heavy, humid heat. Could something else be used to the same effect? For this reader the third stanza's opening inversion makes the whole tercet seem contrived, disturbs the easy conversational tone. Fun! - Dave
  4. Cassini Spacecraft: A Paean

    Very glad you enjoyed, Joel. I could not help regretting the end of the mission, knowing my weekly status updates would now come to an end, with their reliable stream of new science and striking images. It was like the loss of a friend, or at least the completion of a phase of life. The enactment of the planetary protection protocol seems dignified and respectful, exhibiting a deliberated prudence we often miss. That led to the whole death-with-dignity thing, and that to the themes of mutability and mortality, which then placed our own here-and-now in the context of this space exploration event, and on and on. Thanks for responding with such understanding. - Dave
  5. Kyoto - Variations on a Theme by Basho

    Thank you, Terry. I see that this is a form of great interest to you. I appreciate your interest in this piece, which I am in the process of revising into an expanded version. This could take a while... - Dave
  6. Quasimodo

    Not to quibble, but I scan one more rhyme than Judi: abab ccxa deed ff. I wouldn't mention it, except that I have been experimenting with separated end rhymes and enjambment, lately. So this kind of jumped out at me. I like the sense of the thing missing in those around Quasimodo being the one non-rhyming end-word: empathy. - Dave
  7. Reading Simenon in August

    Very Williamsesque in my opinion. Nice capture. - Dave P.S. Dude. Get some a/c.
  8. Coastal

    Phil, I like the way this poem continues to contract to the essentials for your theme. With apologies to Judi, I concur with elimination of the graveyard as adding nothing to the tone that is not already there. "Last night's thunder / bothered no one." Exquisite nod to a universe's indifference to events momentous to the narrator. The absence of the beloved ghosts only his existence and that of his dog who is wonderfully attuned to his best friend's mood. You might try, "fretted by waves", "defined by fretting waves", or other experiments. Something isn't quite right in the line yet. How about, "Gulls tow rusted voices."? I feel the struggle to adequately conclude the poem. The images are imaginative, but not quite fully realized to my ear. I tried a number of ways to reword this, but came up with nothing better. It feels a little abstract for this concrete piece. I really want this line to work because I like the image so much. One problem with the line for me, is the use of "a" here - I think it should be specific (just substitute "the"?). I don't think it would disturb the poem if this stanza picked up an extra line if you need it. Nice experience! - Dave
  9. That sound across the estuary

    Not to be contrary, I like the title as it is, since the information does not appear elsewhere in the poem. It also makes the poem distinctive, eschewing slavish minimalism. - Dave
  10. Cassini Spacecraft: A Paean

    Tinker, I am delighted that you would select this poem as an example of the form. Many thanks for your note of appreciation on the poem's movement and artistic elements, as well as telling me that it was informative for you. I would like to share a link to what I consider the most beautifully artistic (and short) tribute to Cassini's final orbit and plunge: https://www.jpl.nasa.gov/spaceimages/details.php?id=pia21889 Thank you! and enjoy! - Dave
  11. Cassini Spacecraft: A Paean

    Hi Geoff, your comments add further insights, as always. The most informative articles (for the layman) describing the Cassini-Huygens mission I have found are these: http://www.msn.com/en-ca/news/world/cassini-nasas-13-year-saturn-mission-has-ended/ar-AArYFF8 https://www.nytimes.com/2017/09/14/science/cassini-grand-finale-saturn.html https://www.jpl.nasa.gov/news/news.php?feature=6948 As for practical space travel for humans, I fear that Dr. Sagan may be right, though you never know when a breakthrough might suddenly occur. For my part, I was the principal designer for the Electrical and Flight Instrumentation Subsystem (EFIS) for the Solid Rocket Motor Upgrade (SRMU) on the Titan 4B launch vehicle, serendipitously carrying the same name as the intriguing moon that was a principal subject of the Cassini-Huygens mission. When the going got tough (and as you can tell from the poem's narrative, it was sometimes very tough), my colleagues and I often encouraged each other by reminding ourselves of the need to meet the launch window for this historic spacecraft. For nearly a year, I was also technical lead for the effort to develop the Thrust Vector Control (TVC) system for the dual-strap-on SRMU, so I took particular pride in the fact that the spacecraft was launched into its interplanetary trajectory with such accuracy, that a trajectory correction burn was not required. The resultant fuel savings proved a critical enabler for the extended mission phases that revealed so much about Enceladus and Titan, as well as studies of Saturn's atmosphere. Advanced as it was (at the time America's heavy lift rocket), this propulsion system was still of the chemical variety. That kind of propulsion would demand thousands of years just to reach any of the nearby stars. What Sagan was alluding to was propulsion based on more efficient ion thrusters and solar sails which also are not sufficient to human lifespans, since they will require several hundred years for the same trips. As he correctly concludes, our only hope lies in the harnessing of energies that for now defy our capability to sustain, channel, or control: nuclear fusion and anti-matter conversion. The horizon does seem far. Thanks for the comment! - Dave
  12. Witness

    Count me among the involved-to-the-end, doc. I share your ambivalence toward these door knockers, have even been one in the past. This poem is written in what I call the New Style of showing by telling what the narrator feels in the situation (as opposed to telling the reader what to feel.) The last stanza is particularly poignant and even profound, made more acute by the surprising, clever substitution of "bare" for "bear." Note: misspelling or word invention on "reticience"? Not sure that I know what to make of it, if invention. If a misspelling, just bringing it to your attention. - Dave
  13. Puerto Rico Puerto Rico

    From very early childhood I have resented and rejected the notion and language, "acts of God," applied to natural disasters. Misguided interpretation of concepts related to predestination and fate. I am not going to let myself "get started" here. ;-) - Dave
  14. silk worm

    Thanks for the perspective, Terry. Poetry is the medium for tuning wavelengths! - Dave
  15. Friday, Fall

    I like the surprising entry of "cranberry" with the "golds and reds." - Dave

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