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David W. Parsley

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About David W. Parsley

  • Birthday 04/03/1958

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    Rancho Palos Verdes, California, USA
  • Interests
    Literature, philosophy, music, science, religion, God, space exploration, camping, hiking, history, women and feminism, politics, economics, engineering, enterprise and program management, higher mathematics, theology, epistemology, ethics, ontology, cosmology, stock market, art, history, God again, ballet, poets, poems, poetic forms, informal asthetics, film. And other stuff.

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  1. Windshield

    Joel, add me to the list of those who think this extended metaphor just rocks! Like Tony, I look askance at the closing tercet, finding that I like the final line but find the previous two less interesting than the rest of the poem. Could that line be pulled up into the main body and the other two eliminated? Nice poem! - Dave
  2. Without a Compass

    Okay, I really like this one. Right balance of narrative detail and economy. "Your laughter was coffee" - I love it! - Dave
  3. The Escapist

    I keep waiting for part 2, doc. The tone of the thing, the way it moves, fills me with admiration. I feel that I am not connecting all the "apocryphal" and "escapist" dots with the mix of cosmic and mundane here, waiting for the succeeding part(s) of the poem to sharpen the perspective. Nice! - Dave
  4. Someone, Please Fix Me

    A light-hearted personification with which I'm starting to identify all too strongly. I like the way the piece, uhm, flows. - Dave
  5. Self-Portrait 101

    I like the form and your handling of it, Tony. The comments above reflect my own assessment of the piece. As for citing quotes, if I did that, there would a long list at the end of most of my poems, and those of many others, too. So I will respectfully disagree with some on that point, not even sure the italics are required. I have to say that final couplet really packs a punch. - Dave
  6. space station

    I can't help but like this one, Barry. Count me among those who admire the first two lines. The whole thing has a quasi-Ecclesiastes feel to it, with the whole sun-also-rises theme accelerated by a factor of sixteen, with attendant acceleration of disillusionment. "What happens to the wise? The same as happens to the fool. All is vanity and grasping in the wind!" A more concrete rendering of some common themes that recur in your work, at least in the late part of the poem: ghosts and empty reflections (but no moon, which is appropriate). - Dave
  7. Robert Burns dreamscape poem

    Hi Barry, interesting piece, though I like "Quills" more. Strong images. I have diction issues: "mask" appears near end of stanza 1, then near start of stanza 2. Feels repetitive. "incantation" appears twice in the poem, neither time organically, feels forced. plurality mis-match between "selves" and "grain" "incandescence" feels forced Hope that helps. I know how it feels to want more comments on one's poem. - Dave
  8. Call From Concert

    That is absolutely anguishing. So sorry to hear. - David
  9. Out of Sync

    Interesting use of terza rima, Tinker, introducing an irregular metric length in the lines. Clever treatment of indian summer. Query: do you think the first line would work better without "hot"? It seems redundant, though it does leaden the rhythm to bring the sensation of heavy, humid heat. Could something else be used to the same effect? For this reader the third stanza's opening inversion makes the whole tercet seem contrived, disturbs the easy conversational tone. Fun! - Dave
  10. Cassini Spacecraft: A Paean

    Very glad you enjoyed, Joel. I could not help regretting the end of the mission, knowing my weekly status updates would now come to an end, with their reliable stream of new science and striking images. It was like the loss of a friend, or at least the completion of a phase of life. The enactment of the planetary protection protocol seems dignified and respectful, exhibiting a deliberated prudence we often miss. That led to the whole death-with-dignity thing, and that to the themes of mutability and mortality, which then placed our own here-and-now in the context of this space exploration event, and on and on. Thanks for responding with such understanding. - Dave
  11. Kyoto - Variations on a Theme by Basho

    Thank you, Terry. I see that this is a form of great interest to you. I appreciate your interest in this piece, which I am in the process of revising into an expanded version. This could take a while... - Dave
  12. Quasimodo

    Not to quibble, but I scan one more rhyme than Judi: abab ccxa deed ff. I wouldn't mention it, except that I have been experimenting with separated end rhymes and enjambment, lately. So this kind of jumped out at me. I like the sense of the thing missing in those around Quasimodo being the one non-rhyming end-word: empathy. - Dave
  13. Reading Simenon in August

    Very Williamsesque in my opinion. Nice capture. - Dave P.S. Dude. Get some a/c.
  14. Coastal

    Phil, I like the way this poem continues to contract to the essentials for your theme. With apologies to Judi, I concur with elimination of the graveyard as adding nothing to the tone that is not already there. "Last night's thunder / bothered no one." Exquisite nod to a universe's indifference to events momentous to the narrator. The absence of the beloved ghosts only his existence and that of his dog who is wonderfully attuned to his best friend's mood. You might try, "fretted by waves", "defined by fretting waves", or other experiments. Something isn't quite right in the line yet. How about, "Gulls tow rusted voices."? I feel the struggle to adequately conclude the poem. The images are imaginative, but not quite fully realized to my ear. I tried a number of ways to reword this, but came up with nothing better. It feels a little abstract for this concrete piece. I really want this line to work because I like the image so much. One problem with the line for me, is the use of "a" here - I think it should be specific (just substitute "the"?). I don't think it would disturb the poem if this stanza picked up an extra line if you need it. Nice experience! - Dave
  15. That sound across the estuary

    Not to be contrary, I like the title as it is, since the information does not appear elsewhere in the poem. It also makes the poem distinctive, eschewing slavish minimalism. - Dave
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