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Poetry Magnum Opus

Ancestors


Gatekeeper

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Ancestors
Let me jump
across the open space
from cliff to large tree branch
recapitulate the act of ancient cousins.
Hit or miss
it would take less
than three seconds
to white success or black failure.
Would it be
such a bad thing
to revert to the older brain
and remember briefly what it was like?

 

'keeper

from the black desert

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I like the way each line of the stanzas gets longer. Seems to add tension.....And I love the sentiment! Neat poem.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I like the format and fluid way the lines emphasise your subject matter. Looking around the world today, perhaps the "older brain" still functions :smile:

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Hey, no "perhaps" about it.

The older brain prevails.

We are still very much a tribal species.

Look no farther than the entrenched politics of the day,

or the deadly religious fervor from some quarters.

 

We have just lost the capability of swinging from branch to branch.

from the black desert

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The format was not all that intentional.

It emerged as the lines developed.

 

With exceptions, I find it difficult to write to form, with intention.

Much easier to let it "show up".

from the black desert

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Hi Gatekeeper, I love this poem. Interesting form with progressive lines within the quatrains. It is visually inviting to read. I love the concept of leaping across from now to then. I revert to the older brain all of the time. ~~Smile~~

 

~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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