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rumisong

Thanks Giving

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rumisong

The guests we had at our Thanksgiving celebration brought with them (besides the entire meal, we didnt have to cook a thing- how bout that?!)... brought with them a tradition of reading one thing or playing/singing one song etc after the meal was over, yet as we were still gathered around the table... and so, I pulled out a poem that I wrote a year ago, and added to it for the occasion...

 

 

 

 


  • heaven gives us the answers, I think
    it whispers in our ears in the quiet of the night
     
    "in the morning" it says,
    "I want you to go into your garden
    and put your hands straight into the dirt
    dont wait till morning -
    do it right now
    straight in
    sharp, like knife edged trowels
    and pull up two handfulls
    tenderly, like quilt lined baskets
    and give it a good long look -
    carefully, like you mean to find something
    and whatever you see there,
    that has not already fallen from your fingers
    all that wriggles and shifts and glimmers off of the starlight
    ask that -
    ask that, what Love is
    in that banquet
    that is where Ive left it hiding -
    and then, wait for a bit
    the candle youve used
    to light your way,
    let it burn off some of its wax
    and then, ask it again
     
    it will tell you of friends
    who come great distances
    to meet you where you are
    let it tell you of Love that sets a table
    for a meal of compassion and care
    born to this world in every moment
     
    it will speak of the abundance
    it has brought to your doorstep
    it will speak of a dawnlight blessing
    the witness in a few grains of glinting
    humility and toil transformed
    boulders become pebbles and
    the fruit of the fall becomes songs
     
    it carves this Life
    directly from your rib
    and seasons from the heart
    displayed there to behold
    cupped in a timeless passion
    the gifts of human kindness
    signaled from leaf and dust
     
    Let this Love-humus
    become the senses
    the smells, the touch,
    the awareness of mystery
    that will not be turned away
    from the feast
     
    It will tell you
    what you are looking for
    this is your self
    this inquisitive ground
    out of your own eyes, it sees
     
    theres no where to go but now
    theres no when to be but here
     
    and
    if you can,
    have a laugh at ALL of this-
    it's in this way,
    that Loves embrace
    will find its way home

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tonyv

You partook in an interesting tradition, Rumisong, but this is the part I could get used to --

The guests we had at our Thanksgiving celebration brought with them ... the entire meal, we didnt have to cook a thing- how bout that?!)

.

I like how, in your poem, heaven speaks --

 

"in the morning" it says,

"I want you to go into your garden

and put your hands straight into the dirt

 

-- and how its directives quickly escalate, exhibiting an urgency, an excitement --

 

dont wait till morning -

do it right now

straight in ...

 

For me, the next lines take a sinister turn --

sharp, like knife edged trowels

and pull up two handfulls

tenderly, like quilt lined baskets

and give it a good long look -

carefully, like you mean to find something

and whatever you see there,

that has not already fallen from your fingers ...

 

Images of "sharp," knife edged trowels coupled with digging in the dirt, at night, in the garden, with a sense of purpose, makes me think I'm looking into the mind of a serial killer. Nevertheless, there's something sublime about all that wriggles and shifts and glimmers off of the starlight, how the instructions continue --

ask that -

ask that, what Love is

 

-- and so forth.

 

I like how

 

it will tell you of friends

who come great distances

to meet you where you are,

 

and how

 

it carves this Life

directly from your rib,

 

but the following lines are my favorites of all:

there's no where to go but now

there's no when to be but here ...

 

Also, Love-humus and leaf and dust are delightfully original.

 

It's notable that you use Thanks Giving for the title, and Thanksgiving in your introduction to the poem. This would seem to indicate that they are not the same.

 

Tony


Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Larsen M. Callirhoe

HI RUMISONG,

 

nice to meet you. i liked how heaven speaks also. i enjoyed this poem alot. it put me in a festive mood again. by the way welcome to the forum. nice to meet you.

 

victor


Larsen M. Callirhoe

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rumisong
HI RUMISONG,

 

nice to meet you. i liked how heaven speaks also. i enjoyed this poem alot. it put me in a festive mood again. by the way welcome to the forum. nice to meet you.

 

victor

 

Hi Victor, and thank you- Im feeling quite welcomed icon_smile.gif

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rumisong

tonyv wrote:

 

You partook in an interesting tradition, Rumisong, but this is the part
I
could get used to --
The guests we had at our Thanksgiving celebration brought with them ... the entire meal, we didnt have to cook a thing- how bout that?!)

.

 

I may get used to it too- if Im here in the same place next year- my roommates family came in from NY, and did all the cooking- we just supplied the house... (my roommate and I are like brothers, and his youngest daughter is my "niece" in all the ways of the heart- and so his oldest daughter and her family in-law came up, and they too have accepted me and the closeness thats here)

 

I like how, in your poem, heaven speaks --

 

I like how heaven actually speaks to me! icon_wink.gif often when I wake up first thing in the morning icon_wink.gif

 

For me, the next lines take a sinister turn --

Images of "sharp,"
knife edged trowels
coupled with digging in the dirt, at night, in the garden, with a sense of purpose, makes me think I'm looking into the mind of a serial killer. Nevertheless, there's something sublime about
all that wriggles and shifts and glimmers off of the starlight
,

 

LOL! icon_lol.gif

yes, of course! I was just saying over in the Haiku thread- much of my writing has had this urgency Ill find- its around the notion of "dying to self" as it were- seeing the ending of ones grasping and struggle - so Im very pleased here that you picked this up in my poem too!

 

but the following lines are my favorites of all:

there's no where to go but now

there's no when to be but here ...

 

excellent!

 

Also,
Love-humus
and
leaf and dust
are delightfully original.

 

ah, Love-humus... Ill have to give some credit for that use of combination-word in my poem, to Coleman Barks- the great and popular translator of poems by Jelal-ad-Din Rumi (wherefrom I took this moniker years ago) ... he will often come up with a hyphenated phrase similar to this, and so has effectively taught me to try to think of how to use this device too... they are creeping into my normal speech even!- my mind is "thinking" in hyphenateds, as it comes upon a thought, at times... icon_smile.gif

 

It's notable that you use
Thanks Giving
for the title, and
Thanksgiving
in your introduction to the poem. This would seem to indicate that they are not the same.

 

Its perfect that you caught that- very good- yes, this was rather the intent... to get the "holiday" aspect of the day back to its "roots" (pun fully intended ;))

 

thank you so much for taking time with my poem- I see now what you intend for this forum, and I will do my best to be a good participant to honor that!

 

this has been an excellent welcome to this place- thank you again

 

rs

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dr_con

A lovely ballad of gratitude and 'real' thanksgiving. I agree with all of the above, and truly appreciate the genesis of your nom de plume, Rumi would have celebrated this!

 

DC


Join the Voodoo rEvolution. Classes forming now: http://www.integralvoodoo.org/

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Aleksandra

What is there more to say :)

Hello rumisong. I was reading your work on the board, but I wasn't able to work enough, so here is me too, jumping to your poem.

I like how the poem shuts even since the beginning.

 

It is interesting that you are not using much punctuations. So that made me a little bit confused while reading it :). I couldn't stop :D. But anyway, the poem captures the reader's eye, so it's ok even like this, in which I am sure, that you wrote that way, because of some reason.

 

I am glad to see you all over the board, that proves that you like the board, so far, so that makes me happy, if you enjoy.

 

Thank you sharing your work here with us.

 

Aleksandra


The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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goldenlangur

Hello rumisong,

 

 

A beautiful poem both in thought and your use of language. How well it flows and gives the reader a glow of hope. The uplifting tone is so reminiscent of your namesake's search for divine love.

 

it will tell you of friends

who come great distances

to meet you where you are

let it tell you of Love that sets a table

for a meal of compassion and care

born to this world in every moment

 

 

There's also what is perhaps called wiccan or shamanic in the celebratory images:

 

it carves this Life

directly from your rib

and seasons from the heart

displayed there to behold

cupped in a timeless passion

the gifts of human kindness

signaled from leaf and dust

 

Let this Love-humus

become the senses

the smells, the touch,

the awareness of mystery

that will not be turned away

from the feast

 

It will tell you

what you are looking for

this is your self

 

 

 

Thank you for sharing this here.

 

 

 

Happy New year and may all the blessings you describe so splendidly in your work be yours too.

 

 

 

 

goldenlangur


goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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rumisong

goldenlangur wrote:

 

A beautiful poem both in thought and your use of language. How well it flows and gives the reader a glow of hope. The uplifting tone is so reminiscent of your namesake's search for divine love.

 

*BIG Smiles*

 

you know that you pay me the HIGHEST compliment saying this...!

 

There's also what is perhaps called wiccan or shamanic in the celebratory images:

 

Thats great that youre seeing that... yes, there is some Pagen in me as well! icon_wink.gif added into the Buddhist/Sufi/Aboriginal/Christian-Mystic spiritualities... icon_smile.gif

 

Happy New year and may all the blessings you describe so splendidly in your work be yours too.

 

Peace and Blessings to you and all around you, dear friend

 

and to all of everyone here!

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rumisong

Hi Alek!

 

Im very glad for your comments on this poem- thank you!

 

Aleksandra wrote:

 

It is interesting that you are not using much punctuations. So that made me a little bit confused while reading it :). I couldn't stop :D. But anyway, the poem captures the reader's eye, so it's ok even like this, in which I am sure, that you wrote that way, because of some reason.

 

No no- this is really a very important thing-

 

Im all too aware of how unaware I can be about how any care-less-ness with English and puntuation that I may find myself insisting on, may have an impact on those for whom English is not a first language... I want to learn what I need to learn about this very thing- I want to do better in this- (and of course, not compromising whatever I find essential to my poetic message along the way) - PLEASE do teach me by telling me whenEVER you find something that makes it extra difficult to read (only the extra difficult ones though, the regular difficult things I an willing to let you struggle with *evil grin*) ... I know that I can be much too cavalier with my punctuation and my attitude about it- I really dont want it to come to look like a flagrant disregard for others... but I do want it to continue to express "me" as well (which, alas, can be 'different' ;))

 

Of course, this doesnt mean that I will change myself to suit others at some whim- but I really DO what to be sure that the awareness is there more than it is now, and to allow that awareness to come in and change what 'needs to be changed'... this is my poetry-belief- that awareness itself carries the wisdom that is needed- and not attempts at conformity...

 

So please do, if you are willing- please do continue to tell me when my punctuation/cadence/spacing etc, causes confusion... it may in fact be just plain old BAD writing too! (ha- and here is me, thinking "what a poet, am I" ;))

 

note to self: things I know I must do better at when communicating with an INTERNATIONAL audience...

 

  • Starting sentences with a capital letter-

  • Using one period instead of an elipse when ending a sentence...(at least, not ALL the time...)

  • Not arbitrarily using Captial letters in the middle of a sentence.

  • Put apostrophes into your contractions!!! (this one you know you are really bad at!)

  • Pay attention when Aleksandra and others tell you more things you need to work on! Dont be so quick to disregard...

I am glad to see you all over the board, that proves that you like the board, so far, so that makes me happy, if you enjoy.

 

I think it should prove exactly that! Because it is SO! icon_biggrin.png

 

Im very much enjoying my time here- and Im doing as much lurking as I am participating too! - there's much to catch up on with what-all you have been doing around here...

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pawn shop

I LOVE how you introduce the poems you have....

more people should do that....but even that has it's creative side....

poem was well crafted.....real......earthy icon_wink.gif

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rumisong

pawn shop wrote:

 

I LOVE how you introduce the poems you have....

more people should do that....but even that has it's creative side....

 

Oh, Cool! thats nice to hear icon_smile.gif

 

ah, but see- now Im going to think each time I post something 'lets be sure not to forget an intro' ... see what you did? youve set me up! *kidding!*

 

thanks ps!

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