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JoelJosol

The Rain

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JoelJosol

You would rather be in the rain,
getting drenched by the downpour,
listening to thousand rain drops
hitting the pavement.
You step through pools of water,
and your weight lifts them up
to splash on your legs.

I cannot tell the difference
between your tears and the rain
washing down your eyes,
your cheeks, your neck,
but I can see from this window, your white teeth
and what seemed to be a smile
but the breeze and rain wiped them away.

Too bad, I would really rather be home,
in this bed,
to run my playlist over and over,
louder than the sound of the heavy rain.
I don't want to be where the water rises up
to become an angry flash flood,
and carry me away from you.

You are not ready to come home yet
to be warm and safe, and that is OK.
 
NOTE: This was my anniversary poem for this year. I was too shy to come and share it here few months ago. But I told myself why should I feel this way. Thanks for the warm welcome again 🙂

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"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

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tonyv

Joel, the loved one is restless while the speaker is patient, because love is patient. Nice work!

On 5/3/2020 at 11:37 PM, JoelJosol said:

I was too shy to come and share it here few months ago.

Too shy?!? Don't let that happen again!

Tony 🙂


Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Tinker

Hi Joel,  I can't imagine you being shy here.  You have fans here, I for one.  I read this a few days ago and I couldn't grasp the word I was looking for in response.  Thanks Tony, it was "patience".  The poem vibrates with it.  This has a bit of melancholy to it.

~~Judi


~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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JoelJosol

Thanks Tony and Judi. This poem does celebrate the differences or incompatibilities in our marriage. The spaces where we don't meet. But the tension it offered kept us working together for our marriage. Literally, my wife loves to go out when it is raining while I would rather be in bed 🙂


"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

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Tinker

Ha ha Joel,  My marriage is similar, my husband always on the go, I don't want to stay in bed but I do prefer to stay home. He is a wanderer, I am a hermit but then we both make compromises to come together.  

~~Judi

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~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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A. Baez

What a gripping first line! I also like the mixing and confusion of tears with rain. This whole poem has a nice, polished flow.

Quote

I don't want to be where the water rises up
to become an angry flash flood,
and carry me away from you.

This is a nice shift. I enjoy the hyperbolic drama here.

Quote

You are not ready to come home yet
to be warm and safe, and that is OK.

Interesting ending! I enjoy the palpable sense of humanity in this poem, the play of contrasts between personalities. Your background explanation is interesting and relatable. I guess I've found myself on both sides of this and similar equations. 🙂

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JoelJosol

Hi A. Baez, thank you for the feedback. How I led the reader into the poem and the images to paint the existing gap between the characters of the poem. 

 

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"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

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