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Poetry Magnum Opus

Night Falls


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evening

skirted with a golden lace

of lingering sunray

soon night comes

treading on dusky air

in an agile way

all surrenders

clamors of the day

dust adrift…

she enfolds everything

into her sable garment

tunes a serenade

stars strewn

on heaven's supple curtain

moon creeps, crescent

Edited by worm
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Perfect, Worm! Superb musicality in this exquisite lyrical piece. I love the alliteration (lace/lingering, stars/strewn, creeping/crescent) and the rhyme that is peppered in just the right places throughout (sunray/way/day). I love how night comes/treading on dusky air/in an agile way. The poem reminds me a lot of Longfellow's "Night."

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Perfect, Worm! Superb musicality in this exquisite lyrical piece. I love the alliteration (lace/lingering, stars/strewn, creeping/crescent) and the rhyme that is peppered in just the right places throughout (sunray/way/day).

 

Thanks Tony! You always offer me generous comment. Yes I've learnt to use alliteration bit by bit. Congratulations on my little progress!

 

I love how night comes/treading on dusky air/in an agile way. The poem reminds me a lot of Longfellow's "Night."

 

Tony

With your guide, I read Longfellow's poem Night, hardly understand the form sonnet, which seams technically very high to me, but enjoy reading how he felt about Night,

 

The better life begins; the world no more

Molests us; all its records we erase

From the dull common-place book of our lives,

That like a palimpsest is written o'er

With trivial incidents of time and place

 

It sounds we all become newborn when another sun rises. Thanks for this recommendation!

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I agree wholeheartedly with Tony! an exceptional piece filled with life...

 

Something special worm! ;-)

 

J&DC

 

 

I rejoice in every comment you've made for me, though this is not my only wish. Something special speaks a lot. I'm delighted that there are many special poets here.

Thanks for your agreement dr_con!

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goldenlangur

Hi worm,

 

Some lovely sensuous details in your poem:

 

treading on dusky air

 

... enfolds everything

into her sable garment

 

 

Night, it seems, is enchanting :D

 

 

Thank you.

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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