Jump to content
Poetry Magnum Opus

Young Seeds


JoelJosol

Recommended Posts

With backpack on his shoulders he's ready

to leave this view of wide open paddies,

brightly green and golden from reflections

of sunlight from each basin.

 

She often walks with him in these fields,

their small talk he collects in his head

like water settling in the paddies,

as if to ensure high yield of recall for her.

 

But whatever his eyes see in hers,

or whatever she sows in his heart,

it is not enough for promises to be made.

Both are seedlings buried under water.

"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

Link to post
Share on other sites

This one's tight, Joel. It opens with agricultural imagery and ends with the seedling metaphor.

 

I like your reference to the small talk he collects in his head. I've seen you employ this trope in your verse before, and I find it quite effective on a personal level. Yea, I do that, too ...

 

One question: should bag pack be backpack? Thanks for sharing this poem ...

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the catch, Tony. I corrected it.

"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.