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Autobiography of winter night


Bloodyday

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Winter train went home

In the dust of fog

Morning in green is calling.

Eyes of a shrewd hunter

Like bar-b-q flocks

Enjoy songs of wings

In nocturnal mind.

The school of galaxies fills

With crooked cloud’s novels.

 

Sleepless fingers of a night obsessed girl

Sew the warmth

Of red-yellow-green words in sweaters.

Winter night looks for

the dearly lady sheet.

 

 

 

 

 

***doing an experiment and this is the first phase.....i don't know how it works, perhaps this is the worst work of my entire life....actually i am not still sure of this trend!

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Aleksandra

Rony I like this poem. Like for firs read my eyes stayed on the first expression

Winter train went home

In the dust of fog

 

very nicely done, and I like the narrative beginning.

It confused me a little this line:

Morning is calling green.

I don't know why, but I can't get it the meaning with that line.

 

And definitely I don't agree that this is worse poem. It is not bad poem. Sounds so good.

 

I like it

 

ALek

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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Rony,

 

This one is definitely different than your other poems, a lot of imagery here. You have some very creative word arrangement, original expressions such as

 

Eyes of shrewd hunter

Like bar-b-q flocks

 

songs of wings

 

Sleepless fingers of night obsessed girl

 

Perhaps with a bit ironing out (Tony is good at this), it'll be a very good poem.

 

Enjoyed it nonetheless.

 

Lake

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Hi Alek

 

Aleksandra wrote:

 

Morning is calling green.

 

I don't know why, but I can't get it the meaning with that line.

 

i am in some kind of troubles with this poem, because i still couldn't set the the perfect rhythm of the dimensions of words, or something like rythmic flow. Besides i still couldn't decide in which verse it should be perfect. So it becomes a mixture like lot's of spicy stuffs.

 

i made some corrections and some of my upcoming works may have this errogant style but i don't know how much i could succeed!

 

so any kind of advice will be wellcomed and i will be glad if any kind of correction required for the sake of perfection!

 

i want to learn more about the poetic verses and modern styles of expressions!

 

Thanks Alek and i think my recent correction may help you to understand!

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Hi lake

 

 

Thanks for your precious complements and i must say about my work which is nothing but an experiment which might go well or not.

 

actually i am trying to build up some verses full of metaphor having a plot and it might be narrated as puzzle. but i am not sure which rhythm/ verse would be perfect.

 

 

actually intellectual creation is always a mistery for me as it can't be created through a mathematical interpretation.

 

But thanks for your comment and don't forget to make some contributes to make my knowledge richer!

 

i come here to learn!

 

RoNy

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This poem is a blizzard of winter night imagery, and I can't stop reading it in it's entirety! It makes me think of James Wright's translation of Georg Trakl's prose poem, "A Winter Night," which you can find HERE. I'm blown away by this poem, Rony. I wish I wrote this one.

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Hi ToNy

 

 

it's a treasure for me: http://www.literaturnische.de/Trakl/english/texte-e.htm#ged and i will take a vacation for this stuff because my studies on physics, astronomy and other official works along with this worthless verse construction are making me the football in last minute play.

 

couple of days ago, you shared a link of live trance music and now i am obsessed with Armin's new Imagine 2008. and now you are supplying the link of poetry treasure!

 

 

How can i thank you?

 

 

RoNy!

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Hi ToNy

 

 

it's a treasure for me: http://www.literaturnische.de/Trakl/english/texte-e.htm#ged and i will take a vacation for this stuff because my studies on physics, astronomy and other official works along with this worthless verse construction are making me the football in last minute play.

 

couple of days ago, you shared a link of live trance music and now i am obsessed with Armin's new Imagine 2008. and now you are supplying the link of poetry treasure!

 

 

How can i thank you?

 

 

RoNy!

 

Thank you, Rony, for the fabulous link! I'll add it to the LINK ARCHIVE. Of course, I'll also bookmark and treasure it myself.

 

I'm glad you like the trance internet radio channel. There's no need for any special thanks -- just keep your exciting and fresh poems coming. I enjoy them (and your participation here) very much!

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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