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Poetry Magnum Opus

Christmas poem


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After the slumber of a thousand christmases i woke in a forest as the earth’s guest, i received the news about the masses, from the oaks and the dispossessed. fireflies weaved stories of comets and crucifixes out of light carried by the subtle winds of the fireflies flight i passed through the dream of each dreamer on a christmas night,i scattered the embers of a comet and splinters from a crucifix,i became a cathedral of eternal regret for faithless prayers searching for an outlet. on the twenty fifth day i passed over rooftops and waited to hear the caroling of a name, i heard emptiness echoed in the plastic flames of synthetic coal fires and synthetic desires,a robin with a broken wing he sang and sang until his heart stopped beating…

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  • 3 weeks later...

Lots to love in this one, Barry. The narrator presents as someone who has been around for ages. He's timeless, having slept "a thousand Christmases," and thus, he's detached, an observer: "Earth's guest." 

I like how you maintain and expand the fire metaphor from beginning to end, from fireflies to embers to "the plastic flames of synthetic coal fires" which you, in turn, liken to "synthetic desires." "I became a cathedral of eternal regret for faithless prayers searching for an outlet" is especially relevant in a seemingly materialistic, godless era. All of it leads to that unexpected, heart-wrenching depiction of the robin. 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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David W. Parsley

Barry, one feels there is nothing to add after experiencing this tour-de-force.  It is a bleak vision delivered by a persona passing like an emptied Santa Claus or Dickensian spirit doomed to view our (thank you, Tony) uncannily godless era that (in this vision) must expire without song, without redemption.

Plaudits,
- David

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David W. Parsley

Truth?  Very much relieved.  But I feel for those who are disappointed.

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