tonyv Posted May 29, 2009 Share Posted May 29, 2009 -----Grass is supposed to be two feet tall. Here, in America, lifetimes are squandered trimming it down to two inches tall. -----She made a material misrepresentation of fact when (in her poem) she said that the stars are cold. They're not; they're hot. ------Polaris is at the top, σ Octantis -- dim in the distance.---The roof of the van is cold. __________________________________________ polaris -- the northern pole star σ Octantis Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted June 14, 2009 Share Posted June 14, 2009 Ah Tony of course this is a haibun. When GL comes he will prove you too . I know the inspiration of your nice piece and I know how much you enjoy the grass anyway. Well written. Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted November 23, 2009 Share Posted November 23, 2009 (edited) Hi Tony, Terse prose and a haiku that extends it, not necessarily elaborating it but opening it up, certainly makes for haibun :) Aleksandra is absolutely spot-on. I too like how the humble grass takes on a significance in this haibun: Grass is supposed to be two feet tall. Here, in America, lifetimes are squandered trimming it down to two inches tall. Her misrepresentation of the stars seems to evoke a misrepresentation of a more personal nature, giving the haibun a certain poignancy. Thank you. Edited November 23, 2009 by goldenlangur Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted November 28, 2009 Author Share Posted November 28, 2009 Thank you, Goldenlangur, for the encouragement.:) I hope to try again soon. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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