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  1. I loved this exciting thread, thanks to Goldenlangur for showing up at the board. I am so sorry for lost wagons but I am sure we can make another train, more haiku poems. Enjoy my dear friends! P.S Keep your job safe not as before, like me
  2. "Haiku is a way of letting God know we are paying attention." Margaret D McGee, Haiku - the sacred art I am trying to write something everyday but my varied schedule & responsibilities aren't conducive to setting aside a "writing time" ( or maybe I don't have the discpline). I do however find myself responding to moments in my day with haiku-like thoughts. So......... I decided to start a haiku journal... Haiku seems to me to be a perfect vehicle for capturing daily responses since brevitiy and clarity are at the heart of the form. My initial goal is to write & post at least one haiku a day. I probably will have many lapses but only time will tell. I thought I'd share this idea with you all and invite you to join me sharing your own haiku moments here when your heart moves you. A "haiku moment:: A moment when the mind stops and the heart moves."*Margaret D McGee This haiku thread will be a little different from the "haiku train" which builds on others' word images. Here haikus should simply be responses to a moment in time. So as a reminder with an overly simplified definition, haiku is: 17 syllables or less image driven written in the moment shared parallel images. Traditionally in 3 units, 1. an image 2. a parallel or an expansion of the image 3. the human enlightenment or Ah ha moment. often written in a 5/7/5 syllable frame but that is not a hard and fast rule. Although I have to admit I find the 5/7/5 frame seems to naturally finds its way into most of my haiku give or take a syllable. often called senryu (haiku exploiting human nature with a humorous slant) when funny and funny is always welcome here. I really hope to see you contribute your haiku in this thread along with me. ~~Tink
  3. Tinker

    IV . Hindi Region: Triveni

    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Indian Verse Hindi Region The Triveni was introduced in the 1960's by Gulzar, poet and Oscar award winning lyricist who won for best original song in Slum Dog Millionaire. The form is a popular 3 line verse mostly written in Urdu or Hindi. It uses the sher of the ghazal and adds a third line with a totally different perspective. Gulzar likens it to two Indian rivers that join and under which a third river flows. “I called it triveni because the first two lines meet like the Ganga and the Yamuna and complete a thought, it forms a poem on its own. But beneath the two there is the subterranean flow of another, the Saraswati. Hidden. Not visible to the eye. The triveni intends to reveal the Saraswati. The third line, lost in the first two, either changes the meaning of the poem altogether, its focus, or gives it a surprising twist, in the process creating an entirely new poem altogether." The elements of the Triveni are: a poem in 3 lines made up of a complete couplet (a ghazal sher, a two line poem in itself.) followed by a single line. These can be written in a series of Triveni. written in lines of equal length. end words are unrhymed. However in a ghazal sher the main rhyme is found somewhere near the end of L1 and is repeated somewhere in the last half of L2. If the Triveni is written in a series, the end word of L2 of the sher is repeated in refrain, as the end word of L2 in subsequent Trivenis. written with L3 with a different perspective of the same theme of L1 & L2. Triveni The everyday routine of the office humms on and on, questions, quotes, sales and claims spawn my day. Poetic lines flash on my laptop screen to don my day. ~~Judi Van Gorder (Note: I chose to treat the 3rd line of my poem as if it were L2 of a second ghazal couplet. This was my choice, adding the main rhyme and refrain word to L3 is not a required element of the form.)
  4. Tinker


    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Invented Forms Haiku Crystalline Verse is a small poem, limited to 17 syllables, whose primary focus appears to be to match the Japanese clarity of image with the English harmony of sound. It was inspired by the Haiku and like the haiku it may be at its best when written in present tense. Any reference that can place the verse in context much like the Japanese kigo (season) or kidai (symbolic seasonal reference) is recommended. The Crystalline employs the kireji (cutting word) of the haiku. The kireji in haiku is a word that "cuts off" one view and turns the reader to a different view. In a longer Japanese poem the kireji is 2 long lines inserted midway in the poem that change the direction of the poem not only in structure but in thought. A stand alone small poem such as the Crystalline emulates the long poem's kireji couplet long line frame and it should "cut" or turn the view from one line to the next. Unlike haiku which observes the image with objectivity and attempts to keep the ego out of the verse, the Crystalline invites the poet's subjectivity and permits the poet's thought and feelings to be communicated through the verse. The verse form was created by American poet Denis Garrison and more information can be found at his site, Short Verse. The elements of the Crystalline are: a complete couplet. It can be a stand alone poem or written in any number of couplets as a longer poem. Like the Renga, a longer poem of Crystalline stanzas can be written by alternating more than one poet. syllabic, 17 syllables. A regular Crystalline is 8-9 or 9-8 syllables per line. An irregular Crystalline is 2 lines totaling 17 syllables and broken where appropriate other than the 8-9/9-8 regular form. written with the English grammatical rules of syntax, caps and punctuation. In other words no all lower case, omitted punctuation, nor incomplete sentences commonly seen in English haiku. Good grammatical English applies. at the poet's discretion, written with poetic devices such as rhyme, onomatopoeia, metaphor, allusion etc. composed with a "cut" or pivot most often between L1 and L2. untitled. The dust of summer covers the shelf where in spring you last left your ring. Judi Van Gorder Crystalline Award Winners
  5. Tinker


    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Invented Forms The SciFaiku is what the name implies, science fiction haiku an invented verse form introduced by Tom Brinck in 1995. Scifaiku combines science fiction themes with some of the elements of the haiku. The elements of the Scifaiku are: minimal, in the moment with human insight. written with a haiku frame, normally, 17 syllables or less. The poem can be written in the classic 3 lines of 5-7-5 or a variation of line and syllable count. (because of the nature of the subject some technical words could exceed the standard syllable count per line, therefore, as long as minimal amount of words and syllables are used to get the point across, there could be more or less than 17 syllables in the poem. composed of a single concept or image. written with "uncluttered and direct words". written in the moment. finding the Ah-ha, light bulb realization through the understanding of the possibilities of science. poets dance with words cyber ballroom fills with song line dancing in space -judi van gorder
  6. David W. Parsley

    Kyoto - Variations on a Theme by Basho

    .................................. Kyoto - Variations on a Theme by Basho .................................. from NOTES FROM THE COMMON ERA . Through dark pagodas winds the invisible stream - lamps bobbing, fire leaves. * * * * * * * * Strange light spreads across ice where the sun pulled from view. Swifts return. No sound. * * * * * * * * After rain, branches release pink blossom torrents. Hear the cuckoo’s cry. * * * * * * * * Warm breeze in curtains wakes me to sunlight, white wings, dove curled at my breast. previously unpublished © 2013 David W. Parsley Parsley Poetry Collection
  7. Terry L shuff

    Moods, Colors

    The full moons white light, Hues blue, gray on passing clouds, Moods also change colors.
  8. Tinker

    American Sentence

    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry American Verse The American Sentence is a concept of the legendary Beat Poet, Allen Ginsberg. It is simply a poem within 17 syllables in one line. The line should be written in complete sentence(s). It should capture a moment with a “turn”. “poets are people who notice what they notice” Allen Ginsberg Reading Ginsberg’s work you will find that he rarely uses articles such as a, an, the. He believed eliminating unnecessary words gave his work an "immediacy". His trademark style was to, in his words, “condense, condense, condense”. Given that quote you might think he would embrace haiku which in English is 17 syllables broken into lines, most often 5-7-5. But he felt the line breaks reduced the poem to “counting not feeling”. Subsequently, he came up with what he called the American Sentence. "Rainy night on Union Square, full moon. Want more poems? Wait till I’m dead." ~~Allen Ginsberg "Four skinheads stand in the streetlight rain chatting under an umbrella." ~~Allen Ginsberg The elements of the American Sentence are: composed in one line. syllabic, 17 syllables. condensed, written with no unnecessary words or articles. complete sentence or sentences. includes a turn or enlightenment. And my attempt:#1AS Dr. Elboim Famed surgeon in grey tailored suit touches my cold fingers with warm hands. ~~Judi Van Gorder (Note: After having written so many haiku, when I initially read about the American Sentence, I thought, this is just a haiku without the line breaks. To my surprise, after researching and reading about the form, I found myself writing an American Sentence from a totally different perspective than the haiku. I wrote my American Sentence from an emotional space rather than the objective observational space I write my haiku.)
  9. dcmarti1

    Last sunday of advent

    frost on the shingles as the lazy sun sloughs off night's velvet mantle
  10. Tinker

    end of summer haiku

    with the silent dawn fog rides in on summer surf golden poppies sleep -------------------- --jvg
  11. Tinker

    Some random thoughts

    3 haiku, kid parole - hummingbird - poet to reader sun drenched days of June perennial kid parole the child in me smiles *** small bird sips nectar floats on invisible wings nature's hovercraft *** tiny bird hovers on invisible wings sweet morning glory *** words placed on page pass to the soul through eyes and ears poet to reader
  12. Tinker

    Haiku Wannabees

    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Invented Forms Haiku Haiku Wannabees When searching for traditional forms, I have run across several invented forms that attempt to emulate or replace the Haiku. Most often they miss the mark, but some are fun to play with. Cinqku is a 5 line haiku attributed to American poet Denis Garrison found at Poetry Bridge. It particularly explores the use of the line break and retains the maximum syllable count of the haiku. (Note: the haiku is a small poem of 17 syllables or less, the Cinqku is more restrictive with a strict syllable count of 17.) The Cinqku should have a turn or surprise in L4 and L5. The elements of the Cinqku are: a pentastich, a poem in 5 lines. syllabic. A strict syllable count of 2-3-4-6-2 syllables per line. composed with a turn or surprise in L4 or L5. untitled. he saw his life flash before his eyes - her smile and waiting arms took hold ---Mike Monteuil Scattered, fragmented, time spins too fast. in stillness I reclaim myself. ------ Judi Van Gorder Dixdeux, French for ten-two, is illustrated by Anthony Fusco in Caulkins' Handbook on Haiku and Other Form Poems, 1970 . . . It appears to have developed as an alternative to the Haiku. The defining feature is the syllable count. The elements of the Dixdeux are: written in any number of tercets. When written in more than one tercet, L3 becomes a refrain. syllabic, with 10-10-2 syllables per line. is unrhymed. titled, unlike the haiku. Hot Topic by Judi Van Gorder an unopened coke sits in closed up truck outside the summer temperature rises KABOOM! sticky brown liquid spatters upholstery meticulous owner finds mess inside KABOOM! The Haikuette is another seemingly, American answer to the haiku and was introduced by Louise Sipfle in the Caulkins Handbook and included in Berg's Pathways. The defining feature is the absence of verbs. The elements of the Haikuette are: a tristich, a 3 line poem. Each line must be a separate entity, yet must contribute to the whole. syllabic, 17 syllables or less. There is no specified syllable count per line. written without verbs. unrhymed. titled. You by Judi Van Gorder fresh freckled Lily sweet fragrance, pink and spicy your face in the sun The Hay(na)ku or Jánakú is an invented verse form inspired by the haiku that is measured by number of words instead of syllables. It was introduced in 2003 by Eileen Tabios, the then publisher of Meritage Press. The name Haynaku is the Tagalog equivalent of Oh My God! The elements of the Hay(na)ku are: a tristich, a poem written in 3 lines. measured by number of words, L1 is one word, L2 is two words and L3 is three words. There is no restriction on number of syllables in the words. unrhymed. variable, the line order can be reversed, or the form can be chained to create a series of Haynakus. November. . . golden leaves crunch under foot ------- jvg Fallen . . from tree, three bones broken. --------jvg Canvas. . . paint splash dribbles onto page. ------- jvg one plus two always equals three --------- --Fred Johnson The Kimo is an Israeli version of the haiku, found at Poetry Kaleidoscope. The defining feature is that there should be no movement in the imagery. The elements of the Kimo are: a tristich, a 3 line poem. syllabic 10-7-6 syllables per line. the images should be stationary unrhymed. My Dog Angel by Judi Van Gorder Coffee grounds and eggshells on kitchen floor next to overturned trash pail, Angel sleeping nearby. Lune is an "American haiku" invented by poet, Robert Kelly, a tristich in 13 syllables. Other than line and syllable count it has none of the classic requirements of the haiku. Instant Poetry Forms The elements of the Lune are: a poem in 3 lines. measured either by 5-3-5 syllables per line rhyme at the discretion of the poet. Today I cried tears of regret. I was not enough. ------ ---Judi Van Gorder Collom Lune, inspired by the Lune and invented by American poet, Jack Collom, the Collom Lune uses word count rather than syllable count and reverses the count to 3-5-3. The elements of the Collom Lune are: a poem in 3 lines. measured by 3-5-3 words per line. my messy desk stacked with books and bills poetry born here ~~jvg The Quinzaine is an internet form found at Shadow Poetry and Instant Poetry for Kids, named from the French quinze (fifteen) for the 15 syllables the poem contains. The elements of the Quinzaine are: a tristich, a 3 line poem. syllabic, 7-5-3 syllables per line. unrhymed. composed of: L1 a statement, L2 and L3 questions related to the statement. Keats by Judi Van Gorder Poet writes in present tense. When is verse in time, is now then? Tetractys is an internet form claiming to be "Britain's answer to the haiku." Ray Stebbing at Shadow Poetry. "Tetractys" is defined by its name. The name given by classical Greek mathematician, Euclid, to his contention that the number series 1,2,3,4 has mystical significance because its sum is 10. The elements of the Tetractys are: a pentastich, a complete poem in a 5 lines. syllabic, with a progressive syllable count 1-2-3-4-10 per line. sometimes written as a Double Tetractys(2 quintains), when doubled the syllabic pattern is reversed, 1-2-3-4-10-10-4-3-2-1. sometimes it is stanzaic, written in any number of quintains. when written in multiple stanzas the syllabic pattern is a Mirrored Tetractys syllables per line 1-2-3-4-10 10-4-3-2-1 1-2-3-4-10 10-4-3-2-1 etc…. unrhymed. Sleep dormant renewal. Recovery, under rated necessity of life. Judi Van Gorder The Trilinea, one more haiku copycat from Berg's Pathways for a Poet, created by Nellie Amos. It appears to me to be a simplified 15th century Italian Stornello with a gimmick. The defining feature is the word "rose" must appear somewhere in the 3 lines which seems a bit contrived to me. The elements of the Trilinea are: a tristich, a poem in 3 lines. syllabic, with syllable count per line, 4-8-4. rhymed, L1 and L3 rhyme. composed to include the word "rose". titled. tattoo by Judi Van Gorder teardrops of dew cling to a red velvet rose the touch of you Today by Judi Van Gorder I rose to see a world of possibilities beckoning me. The Triquain, found in Berg's Pathways for the Poet 1977 appears to be an attempt at combining the haiku and Crapsey cinquain. It was created by L. Stanley Cheney and referred to in both the Caulkins' Handbook and Pathways. This form comes a little closer to the purpose of haiku than some other haiku wannabees. There is another invented form also called a Triquain that appeared on the internet about 25 years later written in a syllabic heptastich. The elements of the Triquain found in Pathways are: a tristich, a poem in 3 lines. It is composed in 3 units, L1 introduces the subject, L2 expands and leads into action, L3 is the enlightenment or question. syllabic, with 2-7-7 syllable count per line. Titled, unlike the haiku. stud by Judi Van Gorder newborn leggy colt struggles to stand first of many challenges Zip is an American haiku knockoff discovered by Lawrence Eberhardt at Poet's Collective at Wikipedia. Created by John Carley this is a 15 syllable haiku i 2 lines. The elements of the zip are: a distich, a poem in 2 lines syllabic, total 15 syllables, line break at the discretion of the poet each line composed with caesura displayed as a double or triple space rather than punctuation such as comma, or ellipsis. untitled shy sun smiles this winter morning frozen stillness greets my day . . . ~ jvg
  13. Tinker


    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Japanese Verse Haibun is a joining of prose and haiku. Originating in Japan, found as far back as the 10th century and made popular by Basho in the 17th century, it is autobiographic often taking the form of a travelogue. Modern haibun often draws its inspiration from everyday events. The form usually opens with prose which is short narrative. It sets the scene or describes a specific moment in objective detail. The haiku that follows relates to the core of the prose bringing emotional insight through an intensified image. There can be one or more prose-haiku combinations. The prose describes in depth a scene or moment in a detached manner. It should be brief, concise and poetic. It is written in present tense and does not give away the moment of insight that should be revealed in the haiku that follows. The haiku should not be in direct relationship with the prose but bring a different slant to the images to heighten the emotion drawn from the defining moment of the prose revealed in the haiku. It should not repeat words or phrases from the prose. October Rain by Mike Monteuil I cannot shake the dryness in my mouth as we walk along this country road where pick-up trucks and farm tractors shower us with dust. I turn to you once more, after touching your hand, and see that the work of God has taken hold. Now I know.... You can never be mine,never again be mine, even as I try to brush the dust off your habit. October rain – the medicines of a long illness (Dec 2007 Haibun Today) Bark Beetle by Judi Van Gorder Lost for words, I sit at my computer attempting to coax an inspiration from memories, answers unspoken. My thoughts clamber and clash with no clear path. Fingers sit idle on the keys hesitant to type letters onto the page. One stroke at a time, a word, a line, an image slowly grows. forest trail obscured silence roars through dead pines one brittle twig snaps Storm Oh, I so want to write like Walt Whitman. His words take flight, jet-propelled. Energy escalates, raging on the page and filling me with his passion. bold thunderbolts strike to ignite a tempest seared into the sky ~~jvg Sunday Funnies
  14. Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Japanese Verse Renga, Renku, or Haikai-no-renga is the linked poem discipline developed by Basho. It is a cooperative poem of many stanzas. Poets, (2 or more) gather to create a spontaneous poem of alternating 17 syllable (5-7-5), 14 syllable (7-7) stanzas. A popular form of Renga is written in 36 stanzas known as kasen renku. The custom dates back to 13th century Japan. The poets in rotation take turns writing the stanzas. The poem begins with the hokku (5-7-5) recording when and where the gathering occurs, see below. The next stanza (7-7) is usually written by the host, in response to the subtle compliment suggested in the hokku. From there the stanzas are written in turn by the various members of the assembly in an alternating (5-7-5), (7-7) pattern. The poem is ended in a tanka (short poem) which combines 2 renga stanzas into 1. (5-7-5-7-7) The renga or renku is not meant as a narrative, it doesn't tell a sequential story. It is meant to move around, the stanzas should "link and shift" Bruce Ross, How to Haiku. The stanzas link in some subtle way to the previous stanza only, not the whole poem. The link can be through a word, a mood an idea set in the previous stanza. It "develops texture by shifting among several traditional topics without narrative progress" William Higgins, The Haiku Handbook. The elements of the Renga or Renku are: syllabic. Alternating stanzas, usually of 5-7-5 and 7-7 syllables. (onji or sound symbol for which there is no exact translation in English, the closest we can come is syllable) a cooperative poem, written by 2 or more poets. spontaneous. composed with stanzas or verses that "link and shift", it does not tell a sequential story. Can have over a 100 verses (hyakuin renku), but the most popular form is to end at 36 known as kasen renku. (nijuin =20 verses, hankasen = 18 verses, shishi = 16 verses, jusanbutsu = 13 verses & junicho or shisan = 12 verses structured with a beginning, middle and end. Hokku (starting verse), followed by linked verses, and ends with a Tanka (small poem). connected to the seasons. Although the hokku indicates the season in which the gathering occurs, somewhere within the renga, there should be verses referring to each of the seasons to create a complete circle. The following isn't a full renga but the stanzas are written by different poets and it gives you an idea of the pattern of stanzas and "link and shift". shade of giant tree lacy shadows cool poets summer parasol --- jkt (hokku by guest poet) walk of friendship warms the feet the head cooled by task at hand ---jvg (host's response, wakiku or side verse) those who walked before never turned to look for us but left their footprints ---fj (daisan, the third) walk with a poet awhile cool sand between tanned toes ---jkt a walk in the woods putrescent trees on the ground life for small creatures --- mm the smallest life is my life I sit in stillness and write. --- jvg perhaps a poet, summer, spring, winter, or fall, will abide with me. --- cl time ever moves without pause a circle, new life to old ---jkt winter snow is back beginning new cover up to spring's confusion ---jm crystal covers burrowed home I snuggle under down quilt ---jvg Small gray rabbit melts prone into soft snow furrow I'm really not here --- bh the pocket of a soldier carries my letter from home --- jkt in God's Name we war hate can grow in any season we feel no sorrow --- rab sorrow holds regret for loss of what went before loss of what did not spring to winter, back to spring circle of life, love and hate --- jvg (tanka) Hokku, 発句 (opening or starting verse) is the introduction or beginning verse of the Renga or Renku, a linked communal poem. As far back as the 13th century Japan, poets would gather to write a Renga in a kind of poem writing party each poet contributing verse in a linked fashion. Originally, as a compliment to the host, one of the guest poets would write the hokku. The purpose of the hokku is to record the logistics of the gathering, when (season, month and/or time of day) and where (natural setting). By the time of Basho 16th century the hokku could be found as a stand alone poem. It is the precursor of the haiku that came into popularity a bit later. It is this hokku rule of time and place that was carried over into the later haiku which established naming a season with images of the environment as elements of the traditional haiku. The elements of the hokku are: syllabic, 17 syllables or less. (onji or sound symbol for which there is no exact translation in English, the closest we can come is syllable) commonly written in 3 lines often broken at 5-7-5 syllables. names the season, month, and/or time of day as well as the location where the Renga gathering occurs. All of the above can be named through symbols of the season etc. usually written by a guest poet. ふうりうの初やおくの田植うた fūryū no hajime ya oku no taueuta beginnings of poetry— the rice planting songs of the Interior ~~Basho translated by Shirane If I were the guest poet writing a hokku in this time and place, (summer in Northern California) I could write a hokku something like, shade of giant tree lacy shadows cool poets summer parasol ---jvg Nijuin is a 20 stanza renga introduced by 20th century renga master Meiga Higashi. The form not only has the limited # of stanzas, it is the shortest of the rengas, but it also divides the poem into 3 sections. The first 4 stanzas begin in Spring, the next 12 travel through the seasons including love and moon verses and the last 4 stanzas end back in Spring.
  15. Tinker


    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Japanese Verse birth and death of a moment haiku ~~jvg captured moment chosen words placed with care small poem, bright light ~~~jvg Haiku, is a small, imagist poem written in the moment. The image drives the emotion and provides the inspiration for insight or enlightenment. It is said to be a poem in an utterance of a breath. I love this form and find myself responding to moments in the day with haiku-thoughts. The haiku is a descendant of the hokku, which is the first stanza of the much longer communal poem, renga. The purpose of the hokku, usually written by the most prestigious poet in the renga gathering, was to record the time (season) and place (natural surroundings) of the gathering. When in the 13th and 14th centuries the hokku began to take shape as a stand alone poem, it naturally retained its original features. It wasn't until the 20th century that the Japanese modernist poet Masaoka Shiki called the verse form haiku. His student Kyoshi is said to be the founder of the "traditional haiku" in which images from nature (usually tied to the seasons) are expressed. A second student Hekigodo felt the haiku should be broader and anything could be the subject without limiting the images to nature. This is often referred to as "modern haiku". So from the beginning there have been differences of opinion on the subject matter. A "traditional haiku" is like an extension of Zen. The first unit describes a setting in nature, including the direct mention of a season (kigo) or its symbol, (kidai, ...cherry blossoms, geese and many others. In Japanese there are actually journals of kidai that are used by traditional poets.), the second unit expands the image often switching to a surprise or conflicting image and the third relates the human condition, relevant to the setting. Japanese uses no punctuation therefore each unit or image must rely on a strong word or phrase to naturally pause and switch the readers focus. This is known as the kireji (cutting word,) This is usually found in the second unit and is the pivot or cut where the first unit and the third unit could switch places in perfect balance. The "modern haiku" draws images from life experiences and as with the traditional describes the images in 2 different observations, sometimes conflicting or surprising, then offers an insight from the images. Haiku is measured by the syllable in English. I have addressed the differences in the Japanese language and English earlier in my introduction to Japanese poetry. In Japanese the measure of the line is the onji or sound symbol which is actually shorter than most English syllables. There is no exact duplication in English for the Japanese onji so we default to the less complicated, syllable. English translations of Japanese haiku cannot replicate the onji as syllable count and you will find that both Japanese translations and modern American haiku often do not adhere to the common assumption of 5-7-5 syllable or line count. stillness: sinking into the rocks a cricket's voice ----Basho (15th century) Haiku takes place in the moment whether traditional or otherwise. A "haiku moment:: A moment when the mind stops and the heart moves." Margaret D McGee, Haiku - the sacred art. This is one of the most important defining features, in contrast to most poems that dwell in the mind of the poet, "haiku embodies a feeling experienced in a moment of time." Haiku is more than just the present, it is "a moment of awareness, insight, surprise or delight" How to Haiku by Bruce Ross , an ah ha! moment. This adds depth. The elements of Haiku are: syllabic (17 syllables or less) an imagist poem (draws the emotion from the image). Concrete images are described. It is important in haiku to deemphasize the ego. The subject, not the poet is what focuses the haiku. "One of the most common characteristics of haiku,. . . . is silence." Bruce Ross. The words silence or stillness can be used in haiku, but it is the concrete image as described that makes the reader respond to the feeling of silence. written in the moment. The past can be referred to as long as it doesn't overpower the present. one of two forms "traditional" or "modern" "traditional" requires a season be named and images and emotions be drawn from of nature. "modern" can be images of relationship, personality, experience, etc often a tristich, commonly written in 3 lines. BUT, it can be written in 1 or 2 lines. (if not broken into 3 lines, the haiku should still follow the pattern of 3 units, 2 images that either conflict or expand resulting in insight.) The common break down of syllables: L1 5 syllables describes image (traditional name season) L2 7 syllables, adds conflicting image or expands first image L3 5 syllables provide insight (the ah ha! moment) through a juxtaposed image. A description of a natural experience in language that " comes from simplicity, elegance and concentration of mind." Bruce Ross It is not merely a description but the expression of the feeling of the poet from the experience of the moment. Figurative speech, metaphor or simile is generally not used in the haiku, though it can and does appear. Not a drama nor a setting, there should be no manipulation on the part of the poet. Written with an epiphany or ending (satori), that should penetrate into the heart of the theme. It is sincere, uncontrived. When writing, the poet should attempt not to add -"ing" to the end of verbs to avoid artificial emphasis. Written in perfect balance. Repetition should be avoided since it throws off the balance the haiku. "There should be a perfect balance of images, ideas, phrasing, word choice and sound." Bruce Ross An untitled poem which is often numbered. evolutionary, the haiku has been changed by time and embraced by many cultures. The Brazilians even added rhyme A few of my own Ah-ha moments. ~~ Judi Van Gorder hard ground of winter... where late frost threatens to bite daffodils in bloom small stone smooth with time in laughing mountain creek bed I bathe with minnows flour and nuts sprinkled across kitchen floor sweet smell of cookies damp morning breeze floats off of the Pacific salt on my tongue wet dog splashes suds, tremors move from head to tail cat on sofa purrs rain slicked asphalt littered with fallen leaves frost crunches under foot Abbreviated Haiku is written in either 2 lines with syllable count 7/2 or 3 lines with syllable count 3/5/3 or 2/3/2. This is sometimes called Miku. creeper weeds cover garden path blistered hands --jvg Brazilian Haiku is rhymed, either aaa or aba or abb Las Vegas contrite glows with perpetual light all day and all night ---jvg
  16. Tinker

    Senryu and Zappai

    Explore the Craft of Writing Poetry Japanese Verse Senryu is a Japanese syllabic verse that deals primarily with human nature and is often expressed through humor. It developed in the 18th century and is named after Karai Hachiemon, pen name Karai Senryu, who was a haijin (writer of haiku) and judge of comic verse contests. Senryu were originally poems of the merchant class and often made fun of corrupt officials and professionals. The official's child--- How well he learns to open and close his fist! ---anonymous The focus of the modern Senryu can be just about anything as long as it has a human or humorous slant. Senryus are lively, often humorous and sometimes even vulgar. The main characteristics of the Senryu are energy or liveliness in the focus and choice of words, humor as revealed in human nature and use of subjects such as relationships, family, professions, children and pets. It is written in the same frame as the haiku, 17 syllables or less, 2 units of imagery and 1 unit of enlightenment. So if you are wondering if a 3 line, 17 syllable poem is Haiku or Senryu, you can pretty much place the serious poem in the Haiku column and the more human, humorous poems as the Senryu. (but there are humorous Haiku and serious Senryu, go figure..) The elements of the Senryu are: a poem in 3 lines or less. syllabic, 17 syllables or less. commonly written in 3 lines but can be written in 2 lines and can be written with fewer syllables, never more. L1 5 syllables describes image. L2 7 syllables, adds conflicting image or expands first image L3 5 syllables provides insight (the ah ha! moment)through a juxtaposed image. written as a natural human experience in language that is simple, humorous, sometimes bawdy or vulgar. presented with an energy or liveliness in the focus and choice of words often humorous written in the moment. an imagist poem (draws the humor from the image) untitled but can be #ed. Some of my own senryu: ---Judi Van Gorder small child ignores call, parent warns and begins count, "Daddy, don't say fwee." some roads meander others flat out ask for speed don't forget your map fire ignites within, flame mushrooms to the surface autumn days pelican's head bobs beak bulging with trigger fish, shore's stand-up comic dial swings to eighty and road ahead zips behind --- siren sounds militant peace march anti-war protestors brawl an oxymoron Zappai is a silly senryu. I read this in a newletter at Writing.com. It didn't give a source and I've yet to research further but I wanted this included here. Basically, this form is written just to have fun. Other than adhering to the small frame of 17 syllables or less, no other rules apply. Instead of an Ah-ha moment it should have a Ha-ha moment. You could say that considering the original intent of Haiku Fridays in our Playground should be renamed Zappai Friday.
  17. a July 4th xiaoshi and haiku Gathering tangy taste of barbeque sweet corn drips butter taste of love shared with friends ------------- --jvg new neighbors embraced by old friends our circle expands ------------- ---jvg I am still playing with verse form. Well this isn't really a verse form but a "subgenre" from the 1920s of Chinese poetry called xiaoshi which I believe means "small poem" (shi = poetry and xiao = little, diminutive or small). The xiaoshi should be fragmented with minimal explanation, seemingly unrelated images and little indication of cause and effect.
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