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Poetry Magnum Opus

travels (full revision)


dedalus

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I love to bound around

and raise the occasional eyebrow

in my respectable, hardly staid family,

who are so perfectly well-balanced

and weird, in the good old Dublin way.

And I think this is what bothers them,

this enthusiasm: as when you sit half-cut

in a Chinese restaurant in Chiang Mai,

reloading the trail guard's AK-47. Nothing to it.

Off you go so, into the jungle,

three days on a healthy sweaty trek

landing up some nights at a Lisu village

where the women wear their woven clothing.

Further in, very close to the Burmese border,

or maybe across it, who really knows,

you meet the Akha with Victorian coins

smashed into necklaces. At night

they offer you opium. I may go home

months afterwards, to the streets and slanting rain

of grey but cosy Dublin, but my people,

my parents, aunts and cousins, nephews even,

pat me on the head: don't want to know.

 

-----------------------------------------

 

(original)

 

I love to bound around

and leap among

the countries of Southeast Asia.

They be so perfectly

weird, idiotically cool,

as when you sit in a Chinese restaurant

in Chiang Mai, reloading

an AK-47. Nothing to it.

I learned all that shit in the Irish army.

Off you go so, into the jungle,

three days on a sweaty trek

landing up at a Lisu village

where the women wear strange clothing;

and further in, close to the Burmese border,

or maybe across it, who really knows,

you meet the Akha with Victorian coins

smashed into necklaces. At night

they offer you opium.

Edited by dedalus

Drown your sorrows in drink, by all means, but the real sorrows can swim

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Glad to read you, Brendan.

Enjoyed reading your exotic experience traveling around.

 

At night

they offer you opium.

 

Be careful.

 

Now the nuclear plant meltdown is another threat.

 

Take care.

 

Lake

Edited by Lake
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I love to bound around

and leap among

the countries of Southeast Asia.

They be so perfectly

weird, idiotically cool,

as when you sit in a Chinese restaurant

in Chiang Mai, reloading

an AK-47. Nothing to it.

I learned all that shit in the Irish army.

Off you go so, into the jungle,

three days on a sweaty trek

landing up at a Lisu village

where the women wear strange clothing;

and further in, close to the Burmese border,

or maybe across it, who really knows,

you meet the Akha with Victorian coins

smashed into necklaces. At night

they offer you opium.

 

Do they still make "Four Seasons" gold bracelets in Chiang Mai? Long train ride from Bangkok.

fdh

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I always enjoy your exotic adventures, Brendan. I'm always relieved when they resonate with the same sentiment once expressed by a certain Ice Cube: "Today I didn't even have to use my A.K./I got to say it was a good day."

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Oops! This was a very giddy poem coming out of selected memory. The impulse was OK but the execution was sloppy. I've had another look at it and maybe it works a little bit better second time around. One lives in hope ....

 

Is Mise, B

 

PS - We've just had another earthquake, 10.32 pm local time. This is really starting to piss me off

Drown your sorrows in drink, by all means, but the real sorrows can swim

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Hello Brendan glad hear you are safe.

Some enjoyable and colourful imagery here. I like the thought of “Victorian coins smashed into necklaces.” I prefer your revised version; mainly for it's family references which imply a 'black sheep'. And also for the lines, “I may go home/ months afterwards, to the streets and slanting rain/ of grey but cosy Dublin”.

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delano, dear fellow ...

 

I took the overnight bus from Bangkok and zoned out but I do remember taking an endless train ride (possibly coming back) in which I bought a pint naggin of local whiskey for consolation along the way and discovered a smudgy stamp behind the label - you had to peer through the bottle - which assured me it had been distilled and bottled yesterday. Well, you wouldn't want things to go stale ....

Drown your sorrows in drink, by all means, but the real sorrows can swim

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I must say I prefer the revised version, as it fleshed the piece out, nicely. Often we spend our time trying to make our words fewer, but in this case, more was the answer. I have never been anywhere, really, nor done anything of interest in my lifetime but, these kinds of pieces, much like books, take me where I will never travel, just briefly.

 

Enjoyed this one.

 

Stay safe.

 

Tammi

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