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Poetry Magnum Opus

The Audition


badger11

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revision

 

This gaudy thing bobbing in burlesque
offers a bawdy dance and even mimes
some teasing slapstick fun. Her tinsel dreams

of screen star fame faded with the talkies
because her country accent was never posh.
She strips without a blush. Hears the applause.

I light a cigar for images say it best
like a hard slap and through the fug breathe in
my cunning schemes. I applaud my craft.

 

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This gaudy thing bobbing in burlesque
offers a bawdy dance and even mimes
some teasing slapstick fun. Her tinsel dreams

of screen star fame faded with the talkies
because a Brummie accent was never posh.
She strips without a blush. Hears the applause.

I light a cigar for images say it best
like a hard slap and through the fug breathe in
my cunning schemes. I applaud my craft.

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On 7/11/2020 at 2:50 AM, badger11 said:

This gaudy thing bobbing in burlesque
offers a bawdy dance and even mimes
some teasing slapstick fun. Her tinsel dreams

of screen star fame faded with the talkies
because a Brummie accent was never posh.
She strips without a blush. Hears the applause.

I light a cigar for images say it best
like a hard slap and through the fug breathe in
my cunning schemes. I applaud my craft.

This is great work, Phil. It's very much to my taste. 

You do a terrific job "showing" and even seem to say so in L7 --

"I light a cigar for images say it best" :excl:

-- and "fug" is a great choice, a word I've never seen before. 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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-- and "fug" is a great choice, a word I've never seen before.

Pleased you liked that word Tony. I'm attracted by little words that deliver  meaning and sonics rather than latinate polysyllables.

I've tweaked the title.

cheers

Phil

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  • 2 weeks later...

This is a stunning piece Phil. It evokes a time and place transporting it into the present. A very Time Traveling proficient poem. Love it!

thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Phil, you are describing a striptease in some smoke-filled club, right? What a nice way to describe such mundane slice of life. I like the phrase "bobbing in burlesque". But I missed the part about the "craft". Was it referring to a painting or other artwork?

"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

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But I missed the part about the "craft". Was it referring to a painting or other artwork?

Thank you Joel. I was referencing the craft of manipulation.

all the best

Phil

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  • 4 months later...
David W. Parsley

Yeah, I felt a distinct urge to punch that cigar right down the smug narrator's throat...  lol.

Good one, Phil.
- Dave

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David W. Parsley

Well, have to admit, I am pretty good at not acting on such urges.  Luckily I don't encounter very many exploiters or bullies in my every-day life! 😉😁

 

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