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Poetry Magnum Opus

Waterfall


incantation

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incantation

Waterfall a watchtower for summer, lighthouse for winter. Light between
Corsican pines, wind between
Leaves, springs breath between dreams.
Summers powers fade, do magicians 
Dream about magic. Leaves
Degrade. Falling water a tongue
Talking, offering reassurance about 
Returning themes.

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Terry A

Synchronicity.

Rather stunning this poem of yours..... "wind between Leaves ...springs breath between dreams"..............

How do you wrap imagery so effortlessly and so concentrated?!  I will learn this.

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  • 2 weeks later...
David W. Parsley

Hi Barry, everything works for me (so fresh and alive!) until the final two or three lines.  The multiple -ing words dash the clean motion of the piece.  Moreover, for this reader, the poem loses further energy by ending on an abstraction after all the vivid specifics.

My Two,
- David

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