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Poetry Magnum Opus

Sappho speaks to women


eclipse

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sisters sang a new womb into existence,

midwife moon delivers scientists, artists,
soldiers,identity's commute to advance
a new sensibility in which the tree is borne
out of the fruit, you scorn the misogynists
salute. A tattoo of Eve adorns the moon's
delicate wrist and for those equipped to see
in her eyes there is a dreaming tapestry, an inventory
of all my sisters dreams bandaging a bloody wrist
with the sounds of war echoing in blood.
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An intriguing lyric right out of a dreamy antiquity. I particularly liked "delicate wrist" and fruit/salute.

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Hi Barry,  Your title grabbed me right away. 

Then the rhythm of the first two lines read very close to the Sapphic Line Ls-Ls-Lss-Ls-Ls  which caught my attention. The syllable count is there just the stress is off a little.   Actually L2 would be a Sapphic line if you had one short syllable after "delivers".  something like    "midwife moon delivers her scientists, artists"  would be a Sapphic line and I just thought how clever if you covertly built in a touch of the Sapphic frame into this poem.  Just ignore me, I'm rambling,  I've worked with poetic structure too long.  :wub: 

Anyway, I enjoyed reading this piece, the internal rhyme, the alliteration all work to deliver unique images.  Nice,

~~Tink  

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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