goldenlangur Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 through monsoon clouds cleaving wings of a late plane just for a moment a glimpse of Scorpio's sting and your fading smile Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Hi gl, I got an ominous feeling reading this poem. The emotion hangs over the poem like a cloud. You are a master at drawing emotion from an image. Beautiful. I love the images "monsoon clouds cleaving wings" "glimpse of Scorpio's sting". They are as exotic and intriguing as I have come to expect from you. ~~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Temporal elements seem to be central to the theme of this poem -- separation. I think the late plane is what moves me the most. It ties in perfectly with Scorpio's sting and, most forlornly, with your fading smile. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted July 28, 2009 Author Share Posted July 28, 2009 Thank you for such a generous compliment. I'm delighted that the images work to convey the emotion. I like how you've read an ominous feeling. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted July 28, 2009 Author Share Posted July 28, 2009 Thank you Tony for this considered reading. I like how you've read separation and a temporal element in the images of Scorpio's sting and fading smile. I was not sure about late so your comment is very helpful. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 GL- I completely agree with Tony- your ability to convey raw emotion thru delicate images is astounding. Enjoyed immensely! DC Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 Goldenlangur - I like how your words slide in this tanka with one unusual state of feelings. All is there - complete. I loved this one - than you for sharing. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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