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cleaving wings


goldenlangur
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goldenlangur

through monsoon clouds

cleaving wings of a late plane

just for a moment

a glimpse of Scorpio's sting

and your fading smile

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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Hi gl, I got an ominous feeling reading this poem. The emotion hangs over the poem like a cloud. You are a master at drawing emotion from an image. Beautiful.

 

I love the images "monsoon clouds cleaving wings" "glimpse of Scorpio's sting". They are as exotic and intriguing as I have come to expect from you.

 

~~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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Temporal elements seem to be central to the theme of this poem -- separation. I think the late plane is what moves me the most. It ties in perfectly with Scorpio's sting and, most forlornly, with your fading smile.

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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goldenlangur

Thank you for such a generous compliment.

 

 

I'm delighted that the images work to convey the emotion.

 

 

I like how you've read

an ominous feeling.

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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goldenlangur

Thank you Tony for this considered reading.

 

 

I like how you've read separation and a temporal element in the images of Scorpio's sting and fading smile.

 

 

I was not sure about late so your comment is very helpful.

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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GL-

 

I completely agree with Tony- your ability to convey raw emotion thru delicate images is astounding. Enjoyed immensely!

 

DC

thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules.

 

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Goldenlangur - I like how your words slide in this tanka with one unusual state of feelings. All is there - complete.

 

I loved this one - than you for sharing.

 

Aleksandra

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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