goldenlangur Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 This dream -it's always at first light that spills through the yew branches that bow with ruby beads. The old wooden gate, where we often stopped to read the plaque to a fallen hero, is fastened on its iron catch. It is as if I mustn't be here. And yet I must, I must... I fiddle, rattle and heave and all the while the beam spreads over the trimmed hedges, between the spindly stems of the shrubs, over the freshly cut grass down to the corner by the stone wall where you promised me your heart and then broke mine in half. Into the earth, into the dark earth I sink in a pale shaft. How light it is, how light! Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.
tonyv Posted November 16, 2009 Posted November 16, 2009 It's clear that closure for the speaker is elusive: It is as if I mustn't be here. And yet I must, I must... It's nonexistent, an impossibility in her physical universe. I fiddle, rattle and heave and all the while the beam spreads over the trimmed hedges, between the spindly stems of the shrubs, over the freshly cut grass down to the corner by the stone wall where you promised me your heart and then broke mine in half. Understandably, s/he is destroyed. But, as the dream itself shows -- Into the earth, into the dark earth I sink in a pale shaft. How light it is, how light! -- the universe can surprise. The speaker descends, not into darkness as expected, but into the light. Not sure if I got it right, but I enjoyed this prose poem a lot. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic
Aleksandra Posted November 30, 2009 Posted November 30, 2009 Goldenlangur, as Tony I enjoyed this prose poem a lot. It sounds as a dream with open eyes... The ending part is brilliant: Into the earth, into the dark earth I sink in a pale shaft. How light it is, how light! Very interesting piece. It captures the reader. Thank you for sharing. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia
douglas Posted December 3, 2009 Posted December 3, 2009 stunning and evocative! trance-like, dream-like. a riddle and a confession. private and universal. beautifully written. Quote To receive love, you have to give it...
Lake Posted December 10, 2009 Posted December 10, 2009 Hi Golden, It is very unique of you. I enjoy reading this prose poem as I do reading your haiku and tanka. Your poems always carry that wabi-sabi characteristics, and a leap at the end. Hope all is well with you. Lake Quote
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