Jump to content
Poetry Magnum Opus

Recommended Posts

Posted

Lost Sages

 

 

Day residue veils the truth

clogs my pores with taxes

relations worry and tremble

 

Does my daughter love me

do these friends understand

what I dream or only suppose

inevitable miracles of compreh-

 

ension- Dropout of your narrative

and step into theirs- see a Letter

as the absence of the page- Am I

a friendly fellow-a drunken Roshi

or just a lost sage breathing

precious air consuming

resources better

eaten by my

superiors

 

on this Earth it is hard to be a Homesteader

and to battle the Dragon amid mediated dreams

of success-adulthood-truth and response-

ability while aware that he lies sleeping

just beneath your bed-Everything

you-are the substrate of Being

Tossing and Turning

fighting to wake.

Posted

Hi dr_con,

 

It gives me a few reads, but I am still not sure if I can say what my reaction is clearly.

It is a well crafted poem, not doubt - S1 draws me in immediately, good images, metaphors.

 

Day residue veils the truth

clogs my pores with taxes

relations worry and tremble

 

The language is concise, condensed. Much admired.

 

Then the sage started from questioning the personal relationship

 

Does my daughter love me

do these friends understand

...

 

to a realization in the end that

 

on this Earth it is hard to be a Homesteader

...

 

Content wise, it reminds me of what Qu Yuan (a poet) once said "everyone is drunk whereas I am sober."

 

A thought provoking write indeed.

 

Best,

 

Lake

Posted

Lake,

 

Many thanks for your considered and insightful reading- Have not been writing as much recently- but feel new insights percolating in the depths this is just the newest from the infinte garden...

 

Much appreciation!

 

DC&J

Posted
... Have not been writing as much recently- but feel new insights percolating in the depths this is just the newest from the infinte garden... "

Even when you're "not writing much," Dr. Con, you still produce more than I do, and I'm envious of that.

 

Lake has already provided some excellent thoughts on this poem. I would just add that I like how the speaker questions his purpose, his "usefulness":

 

... as the absence of the page- Am I

a friendly fellow-a drunken Roshi

or just a lost sage breathing

precious air consuming

resources better

eaten by my

superiors

It makes me think of what I read somewhere about the way certain indigenous peoples dealt with their aged, "less-useful" ones: by putting them on a raft with a limited supply of food and leaving them adrift on the ocean. Yea, I read that, but I don't know if it's true. If it is true, I wonder how those "lost sages" felt ... Did they simply accept their fates as part of the "natural order of things"?

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

I can only add here my enjoyment while reading this poem Juris. I agree for S1, and also I loved the last one. This poem has a special power together with the title.

 

I agree with Lake, this is well crafted poem.

 

Good job.

 

Aleksandra

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

Posted

Many Thanks Tony and Aleks! Glad you enjoyed my meanderings;-)

 

 

DC&J

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.