dr_con Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 Lost Sages Day residue veils the truth clogs my pores with taxes relations worry and tremble Does my daughter love me do these friends understand what I dream or only suppose inevitable miracles of compreh- ension- Dropout of your narrative and step into theirs- see a Letter as the absence of the page- Am I a friendly fellow-a drunken Roshi or just a lost sage breathing precious air consuming resources better eaten by my superiors on this Earth it is hard to be a Homesteader and to battle the Dragon amid mediated dreams of success-adulthood-truth and response- ability while aware that he lies sleeping just beneath your bed-Everything you-are the substrate of Being Tossing and Turning fighting to wake. Quote thegateless.org
Lake Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Hi dr_con, It gives me a few reads, but I am still not sure if I can say what my reaction is clearly. It is a well crafted poem, not doubt - S1 draws me in immediately, good images, metaphors. Day residue veils the truthclogs my pores with taxes relations worry and tremble The language is concise, condensed. Much admired. Then the sage started from questioning the personal relationship Does my daughter love medo these friends understand ... to a realization in the end that on this Earth it is hard to be a Homesteader... Content wise, it reminds me of what Qu Yuan (a poet) once said "everyone is drunk whereas I am sober." A thought provoking write indeed. Best, Lake Quote
dr_con Posted November 26, 2009 Author Posted November 26, 2009 Lake, Many thanks for your considered and insightful reading- Have not been writing as much recently- but feel new insights percolating in the depths this is just the newest from the infinte garden... Much appreciation! DC&J Quote thegateless.org
tonyv Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 ... Have not been writing as much recently- but feel new insights percolating in the depths this is just the newest from the infinte garden... " Even when you're "not writing much," Dr. Con, you still produce more than I do, and I'm envious of that. Lake has already provided some excellent thoughts on this poem. I would just add that I like how the speaker questions his purpose, his "usefulness": ... as the absence of the page- Am Ia friendly fellow-a drunken Roshi or just a lost sage breathing precious air consuming resources better eaten by my superiors It makes me think of what I read somewhere about the way certain indigenous peoples dealt with their aged, "less-useful" ones: by putting them on a raft with a limited supply of food and leaving them adrift on the ocean. Yea, I read that, but I don't know if it's true. If it is true, I wonder how those "lost sages" felt ... Did they simply accept their fates as part of the "natural order of things"? Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic
Aleksandra Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 I can only add here my enjoyment while reading this poem Juris. I agree for S1, and also I loved the last one. This poem has a special power together with the title. I agree with Lake, this is well crafted poem. Good job. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia
dr_con Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 Many Thanks Tony and Aleks! Glad you enjoyed my meanderings;-) DC&J Quote thegateless.org
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