JoelJosol Posted December 31, 2009 Share Posted December 31, 2009 (edited) Darkness breaks up into colors then black. The ears catch first the silence, then the blast. He carries on between the presence and absence. He knows you are still here, slipping back and forth in his memory like a New Year’s eve fireworks. Edited January 2, 2010 by JoelJosol Quote "Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 The simile conjures for me the ambiguity of rememberance: the joy, the realisation of loss. badge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waxwings Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 badge, I hate to admit it, but I failt to see simile, i.e., a trope, one of those figures of speech that are some of the tools for making poetry. There are other 'similes' not so labeled, and I would appreciate it if you clarify this for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 Beautifully expressed, Joel, especially the first four lines. The at-first-glance seeming contradictions of darkness ... into colors and how the ears catch first the silence impart a familiarity to the situation. It's almost like one knows what to expect. This sets the stage for the rest of the poem which focuses on that place of uncertainty that exists between the presence and absence felt by the survivor. The sense of isolation is magnified when one considers the title: New Year Fragments. New Year is typically a time of hope and celebration. Not much of that going on for the protagonist in this poem. I loved this. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waxwings Posted January 7, 2010 Share Posted January 7, 2010 (edited) I am strangely touched by some un-name-able insight to this poem as a whole. I am still struggling with hooking my responses to the proper preceding message. Thus, my previous contained a query to badge and had nothing re any specific artistic feature. Hope you caught that and not thought I was perhaps trying to pan your poem. Edited January 7, 2010 by waxwings Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted January 11, 2010 Share Posted January 11, 2010 Hi JoelJosol, I too got a sense of dislocation and grieving : He carries on between the presence and absence. He knows you are still here, slipping back and forth The He being lost in some kind of mental and emotional catacomb beyond the reach of the loved and grieving one. Thank you. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted January 14, 2010 Share Posted January 14, 2010 JJ- An excellent reflection on the liminal space transcribed by the full engagement with a moment both the presence of the other by simply remembering but simultaneously the absence heightened by the same remembering- all too human and very profound-- Happy- happy 2010! DC&J Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted January 16, 2010 Share Posted January 16, 2010 A brilliant composed poem, Joel. The solid expressions and imagery works so well and that makes the poem amazing. I love it. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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