badger11 Posted February 14, 2010 Share Posted February 14, 2010 Do you remember the red boots and the muddy puddle? I remember the splash you made with the crowd, the laughter that colours my days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted February 14, 2010 Share Posted February 14, 2010 Hi badge, Wonderfully playful and yet wistful - if I'm not too off the mark - this has such a tanka-like tone and effect. I love the : ... the laughterthat colours my days. Thank you. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted February 14, 2010 Author Share Posted February 14, 2010 - this has such a tanka-like tone and effect. I must admit my friend I had not intended that, but perhaps a subconscious effect of my reading elsewhere! hope all is well badge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted February 14, 2010 Share Posted February 14, 2010 I must admit my friend I had not intended that, but perhaps a subconscious effect of my reading elsewhere! hope all is well badge You tell a story well in a few lines so reminiscent of the tanka. Me thinks you've got the spirit of the form :icon_sunny: Celebrating our new year and hoping to write more in the months to come. Lovely to read your work again. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted February 15, 2010 Share Posted February 15, 2010 I see a lovely exchange has taken place here, triggered by a lovely "Valentine Poem." :D (I, too, noticed its tanka-like characteristics. ) But I love its personal element. This one's like a snapshot. Happy V-Day! Tony :heart: Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted February 15, 2010 Share Posted February 15, 2010 Tanka or not, but a wonderful poem :). Very soft and bright poem. In some way nostalgic, also. I read this with a smile on my face, and I sunk in feelings. Very positive poem. Badge, thank you for this calmly and enjoyable poem. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted February 15, 2010 Author Share Posted February 15, 2010 So much sunshine and smiles my friends :HUG: badge :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted February 15, 2010 Share Posted February 15, 2010 Oh yes- sunshine and smiles evoked by this lovely beam of sunshine- well done Badge! DC&J Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waxwings Posted February 16, 2010 Share Posted February 16, 2010 (edited) I have always said that a good poem will stand up because it is good in itself. Being reminiscent of some classic form is not a requirement. This one shines, esp. because of the magnificent idea that (her/your) "laughter (does) color my days" [forgive the slight paraphrase]. It is way beyond what a traditional tanka would dare to say, because Japanese poetry is more into symbolic statements to evoke emotion, while this is breathtakingly hidden a trope, not readily apparent untill you see what is not said. Thanks for letting me find it. Edited February 16, 2010 by waxwings Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted February 18, 2010 Author Share Posted February 18, 2010 Thank you WW and DR C. for bringing some sunshine on this snowy day. badge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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