Frank E Gibbard Posted April 2, 2010 Share Posted April 2, 2010 Word on word I seek, and write a piece In hope of worth in process of selection, Nor that the poem be inimical to release, But duly stands a test of close inspection. As a baker wants his prized bread to rise Then may a poet seek the perfect strophe, In both crafts they need to act quite wise, Make a crusty poem, compose a lusty loaf. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted April 2, 2010 Share Posted April 2, 2010 Ah my favorite subset of poetry- poems about poetry... Made me smile- lifted my spirits and got a rise out of me... No half baked by any means Frank! DC&J Quote thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank E Gibbard Posted April 2, 2010 Author Share Posted April 2, 2010 Ah my favorite subset of poetry- poems about poetry... Made me smile- lifted my spirits and got a rise out of me... No half baked by any means Frank! >>>> Well done I hoped, but modesty forbids DC, no more baking puns from me. Cheers,,, FRANK. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lake Posted April 2, 2010 Share Posted April 2, 2010 Love the comparison of making a poem and baking a bread, or baking a poem and making a bread. The last line Make a crusty poem, compose a lusty loaf. is very tasty. For some reason I read "Nor" as "Not" in the line "Nor that the poem be inimical to release" Enjoyed the idea and thought in the poem. Cheers, Lake Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted April 2, 2010 Share Posted April 2, 2010 Fantastic metaphor, Frank. Both writing a poem and baking bread are challenging, rewarding tasks. (I think some people just make them look easy.) What I like about your trope is that hint of an additional surprise ingredient -- the hope of peer approval: Word on word I seek, and write a piece In hope of worth in process of selection, Nor that the poem be inimical to release, But duly stands a test of close inspection. The reference to natural selection is well placed. This one's honest, the way a poem should be. The title fits, too. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worm Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 My focus is on how metaphor is applied naturally here, as water fluid from poet to baker. The second strophe rubs up the two, making an integrated part. But duly stands a test of close inspection. This is also true and encouraging, for every man has his hobby-horse, which is entirely a matter of choice/tastes. I have a special liking for the phrasing and the middle rhyming, crusty/ lusty, prized/rise/ quite/wise, poet/strophe, poet/compose/loaf. Transferred epithet is well handled in crusty poem. The usage of ‘nor’ behind an assertive sentence is new to me. I’ve learnt. Frank, your poem is a lusty loaf. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank E Gibbard Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 Thank you so much Xiao-zhen for your critique. I certainly appreciate the studious analysis you give our poetry. Frank Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank E Gibbard Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 Love the comparison of making a poem and baking a bread, or baking a poem and making a bread. Cheers, Lake. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank E Gibbard Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 Fantastic metaphor, Frank. Both writing a poem and baking bread are challenging, rewarding tasks. This one's honest, the way a poem should be. The title fits, too. Tony I want to thank you Tony for the detailed appreciation you give our pieces and these comments. Frank Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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