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Poetry Magnum Opus

It Seems Like The Magic Is Over


Larsen M. Callirhoe
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Larsen M. Callirhoe

Just yesterday,

I held your hands

walking along the shore.

 

I promised you the world

and knew everything

would work itself out.

 

It seems like the magic is over

yesterday is all we had.

We made love under the stars

and we woke up

to the sun shining on us.

 

Today I feel so apart

from the world we do live in.

 

Sometimes I light a candle

only for you to blow it out.

 

Shooting stars

in the heavens above

if only I knew

what to wish for.

 

Sparkling memories

of the way it used to be.

 

Sometimes life is like a grain of salt.

It does loose its appeal

after the turmoil we have been thru.

 

Today I make a promise to you.

I'm not going to change

just going to look at life

from your point of view.

 

It seems like the magic is over

just yesterday is all we shared.

If tomorrow was for us not to be.

 

It is just fading memories.

Like the rose I gave you.

Why did you leave me

without saying goodbye.

 

Tonight I cry on my pillow

the tears soak my dreams.

 

It seems like the magic is over gain.

When we meet again

we live in two different world now.

 

Those feelings come creeping again.

But it seems like the magic is over again.

Yesterday is all we shared.

 

Just say I love you

but that is not

the way it is going to be.

 

So I say goodbye

and walk out the door.

 

Never to behold your beauty again.

Yes it seems the magic is over.

Larsen M. Callirhoe

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Hi Victor, I really like this very sad love poem. The best line of the poem is

 

"the tears soak my dreams."

 

And honestly if it was mine, that is where I would end it. It would leave the reader with a powerful image that says it all. The part of the poem after that line just tends to water down the impact. I think as poets we tend to get too wordy, tell too much when I few power words say it all. (At least that is one of my weaknesses. See I just keep rambling on an on.)

 

This was a beautiful piece.

 

~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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We made love under the stars

and we woke up

to the sun shining on us.

 

Today I feel so apart

from the world we do live in.

 

Sometimes I light a candle

only for you to blow it out.

 

I love this part... for me it really speaks to the nature of relationships and how the connection we feel in new love so often dissipates in the light of reality and even though both parties want to rekindle it, often the timing is eternally off-kilter and we can never really go back to how it was. Sad, lovely and poignant. Thank you.

 

I will also echo Tinker's sentiment about less could very possibly be more in this case, although I don't feel it's always so.

 

~Rachel

Edited by RHommel
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Vic, I love this sad poem. There is always melancholy in your poems and also you are keeping the touch with the reality. You are aware of the truth and you make it always so easy to the reader to feel the same as you feel it.

 

Sometimes life is like a grain of salt. - this is wonderful expression and conclusion. And I think, same as Tink, that this line:"the tears soak my dreams." is one of the best lines in your poem.

 

Great poem.

 

Aleksandra

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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Larsen M. Callirhoe

Aleks, you get my points exactly why I do water down as tinker says here but i want people to think and feel as I do. I could take some stuff out but my dreams tell me my poetry will be famous all over the world lol. allot of women relate to my poem more easily seeing my tender side than the machoness of men lol.

 

thanks for commenting rachel, judy, and alek.

 

sorry my space bar is sticking I spilled a drop of juice on it two days ago.

 

victor

Larsen M. Callirhoe

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I like how this poem exhibits a bit of youthful optimism --

 

Just yesterday,

I held your hands

walking along the shore.

 

I promised you the world

and knew everything

would work itself out.

-- followed by a downward spiral that comes full circle to the poem's title:

 

Yes it seems the magic is over.

I enjoyed the poem's logical progression, as always, Victor.

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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goldenlangur

Hi victor,

 

So many poignant details in you melancholy poem. This really strikes:

 

Today I feel so apart

from the world we do live in.

 

Sometimes I light a candle

only for you to blow it out.

 

 

So much longing and pain you convey in this poem.

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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