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Solitaire


Tinker
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Solitaire

Red Six on black Seven,
Jack on Queen,
spades line up, Ace,
Two, Three, Four.
Another, diamonds this time,
breathing in rhythm
with the numbers.

The click-click of the cards
is the pulse. Pupils scan,
register red hearts, black clubs,
parts of a regulated whole.
Chaos abated, order restored.
                   ~~Judi Van Gorder

 

Solitaire (original)

Red four on black five,
Jack on Queen,
spades line up, Ace,
two, three, four,
another, diamonds this time,
I breathe in rhythm
with the numbers.

The click of the cards
is my pulse, pupils scan
registering red hearts, black clubs, parts
of a regulated whole.
Chaos is abated,
order restored.
--- Judi Van Gorder

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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Tinker, this is fantastic! The way the player is immersed in the game, both mentally and physically, is built into the rythm of the poem:

Red four on black five,

Jack on Queen,

spades line up, Ace,

two, three, four,

another, diamonds this time,

I breathe in rhythm

with the numbers.

 

The click of the cards

is my pulse, pupils scan

registering red hearts, black clubs, parts

of a regulated whole.

Chaos is abated,

order restored.

Yes, the cards are a part of the regulated whole -- the game -- but it's almost as if the player and the game are one, managing chaos until order is restored. Very impressive!

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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goldenlangur

Hi Tink,

 

It's amazing how you used a game of cards to create this lovely poem - the colours, images and the sounds make it flow well and then you inject a sense of purpose to crown it all!

 

 

I enjoyed this very much.

 

 

goldenalngur

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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Thank you Tony, Its a form of meditation. If I become one with the cards, that is the goal, becoming one with your surroundings. :D

 

Hi gl, Thank you, admittedly a couple of fast games of Solitaire and my jumbled mind becomes clear.

 

~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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Tink, this is very clever written poem, I like it so much. And yes card games can be metaphor for life, thats for sure :) . So your poem is very well expressed and created.

 

Thank you for sharing.

 

Aleksandra

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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The last two lines were a surprise for me, Tink. I play solitaire as well. Made me read the poem again.

"Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach

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  • 1 year later...

Solitaire

Red Six on black Seven,
         Jack on Queen,
spades line up,
                             Ace,
Two, Three, Four.
Another, diamonds this time,
breathing in rhythm
with the numbers.

The click-click,
         slap of the cards
                   is the pulse.
Pupils scan,
register red hearts,
                   black clubs,
parts of a regulated whole.

Chaos abated,
                   order restored.
                    ~~Judi Van Gorder

rewrite

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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  • 2 weeks later...

Order restored.

 

I loved that.

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