rumisong Posted November 17, 2010 Share Posted November 17, 2010 I know it was sophomore year in high school, so I had to have been 15-- we were given to write a sonnet over the weekend, and here is where I learned about iambic pentameter, and abab cdcd efef gg rhyme scheme-- the next Monday, (or, I seem to remember it might have been a three day weekend-- so, it could have been Tuesday) the teacher asked if some of us wanted to read our poems to the class-- I seem to remember being about the third student to read theirs-- the teacher said something about there only being one other student in all of his classes who had a "religious" theme to their poem, other than myself, and for whatever reason, I thought something like "but this isnt really religious (?)" --Im not sure what made me think this, because today I can certainly understand the teachers remark... this is a very funny detail to me today-- it sticks with me in this story... I also remember clearly the teacher asking those of us who read their poems (six ? in all maybe?) how long it took us to write them-- I was the last to answer, after the others claimed things like "all day", "three or four hours", "the whole weekend", etc, I had to tell the truth: "twenty, maybe thirty minutes..." I remember well the disbelieving look the teacher shot at me-- and I remember repeating, because it was the truth, but repeating the longer of the two times "it did, it took me a half an hour" and I shrugged, like, 'why shouldnt it have?' I seem to remember other kids eyes on me... I know that I saved this original in my papers over the years, but sadly, it seems to now be lost-- I dont know where it would be, as Ive lost many of my possessions in two different instances (half lost, and then half again lost and now half again may be in jeopardy of loss still.) So, I now have to rely on my memory to share it here- and I cant for the life of me figure out what happened to the missing stanza-- I honestly thought that it was a full sonnet of 14 lines, but my memory is a COMPLETE blank on what would be the missing 4 lines-- I just have NO GUESS, and NO CLUE in my memory to even start me off on ANY of these lines, leading me now to believe that we may have been allowed to write a shortened sonnet for the assignment, and it is now a detail that my memory is leaving out... (making me all the more curious to want to recover the original, and find out what my memory has left behind) I also remember my great disagreement with the teacher, over the stress on the two syllables of the word "entire"-- he insisted that it could only be stressed one way, thus NOT making it a perfect Iambic Pentameter-- where I had written and used the word with my voice giving it such a stressing that would allow it as a perfect iamb... (now, Tony, you might see where I was 'coming from' in the "Rim" thread)-- for my voice to say ENtire is just as valid as to say enTIRE, which was the only way the teacher would accept it-- and so, he led me to think (or wanted me to think, I never really "gave" him his opinion on this) that my poem was not truly a sonnet-- whatever... and so, without further ado, here is 15 year old rumisong's very first poem, that was not a "roses are red" work for mom's birthday card... the dusk falls silent o'er the misty ground a glowing sunset shimmers through the trees the entire earth at rest there is no sound I shudder at the chill that's from the breeze against the golden sky I see a flock the geese are on their southward trek through time a time that's measured by a man made clock yet God had made the instinct, theirs and mine the earth around us is a wondrous thing to know there is a God Almighty King pray with me, will you? that I find the (answer to the) missing 4 lines in my dreams one of these nights?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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