dr_con Posted April 4, 2011 Share Posted April 4, 2011 The Bones Stay Behind Walking through walls I brought back stories of gods and demons alternate geometries cosmic salesmen a pitch always ending in new apocalypses cosmic serpent sw- allows us whole _____________Mu defies imaginal realities both unseen and felt undeniable matter How real the annoyed spider building thick web behind cloth gate pale Guadalupe is moved look past unused old window Wait for a letter an invitation to sojourn a new world When we travel the smallest thing reminds us at journey’s end the bones always stay behind. Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rosschandler Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 this structure is very unique. poetic display is very affective on the reader. this topic is so universal and cosmic, grand, and yet you so eloquently and succinctly spek of it. good job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abstrect-christ Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 nicely done.s Quote Pinhead "Unbearable, isn't it? The suffering of strangers, the agony of friends. There is a secret song at the center of the world, Joey, and its sound is like razors through flesh." Joey "I don't believe you." Pinhead "Oh come, you can hear its faint echo right now. I'm here to turn up the volume. To press the stinking face of humanity into the dark blood of its own secret heart." "There's a starving beast inside my chestplaying with me until he's boredThen, slowly burying his tusks in my fleshcrawling his way out he rips open old woundsWhen I reach for the knife placed on the bedside tableits blade reflects my determined faceto plant it in my chestand carve a hole so deep it snaps my veinsHollow me out, I want to feel empty"-- "Being Able To Feel Nothing" by Oathbreakerhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBPy3xNwwL8 "Sky turns to a deeper grey the sun fades by the moon hell's come from the distant hills tortures dreams of the doomed and they pray, yet they prey and they pray, still they prey"-- "Still They Prey" by Coughhttps://soundcloud.com/relapserecords/sets/cough-still-they-pray Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benjamin Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 (edited) Your poems fascinate me, reading this one was, I felt, rather like trying to unravel a small Gordian knot. Enjoyed. Benjamin. Edited April 6, 2011 by Benjamin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted April 6, 2011 Author Share Posted April 6, 2011 Many Thanks; Ross, S! Benjamin: Now you know the first lesson of MU! ;-) Joshu's Dog Many Thanks! DC&J Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dedalus Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Hello the doc, My advice is scrap the visuals and line breaks (poems are written to be listened to) AND STAY ON MESSAGE. Ignore me, please. A lot of people do. ;) Whatever: good luck to you, Brendan Quote Drown your sorrows in drink, by all means, but the real sorrows can swim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 I suppose they do, Juris. Perhaps we become a part of the places we are, up to and including our domiciles ... Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted April 14, 2011 Share Posted April 14, 2011 Hi DC, Your allusion to Mu immediately evokes nothingness and then I wonder if it alludes also to the lost continent. Even if I am clueless about your illusion your poem is richly textured and teases both the mind and the senses. I love these details: cosmic salesmen, annoyed spider, bones always stay behind Is pale Guadalupe a reference to the volcanic island of Guadalupe? So much to mull over and unravel. A journey beyond the surface of things and immediate allusions. Thank you. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted April 16, 2011 Share Posted April 16, 2011 Well, this poem I loved. Juris, this poem is wonderful. I loved almost every verse. I read it more than once, and I am sure I'll come back to read it again. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted April 21, 2011 Share Posted April 21, 2011 Ooooh D_C, this is nice... I loved the stylized writing that gave this piece an interesting slant. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted April 21, 2011 Author Share Posted April 21, 2011 Thanks All! Brendan my partner said the same thing- and I agree- But reading it out-loud those peculiarities would be mute so, for now;-) Really Thanks all for the feedback Haope all are well and I'll try to get back in the swing of things after poetry month! DC&J Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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