Under The Stars

[Larsen M. Callirhoe]

Under The Stars

 

I hold you my beloved in my arms

ever so tightly and ever so calmly

under the canopy of the nighttime sky.

I wish for a shooting star to pass by.

 

Many of the vast stars in the heavens

twinkle on us this evening by the sea.

In the shallow water we dance merrily

as the tides come crashing in and out.

 

 

I make love to Elizabeth in the ocean

the water was very salty were we had

intercourse on the beach Miami, Florida.

Half naked models watch us at dawn.

 

Neither of us mind the models watching

us make love in the ocean till sunrise.

For now this is a dream, but one day

it will become reality under the stars.

[dr_con]

Like the details!

 

;-)

 

DC&J

[Tinker]

Wow Victor, This is quite different from most of your work. I loved the neat quatrains with equal length lines... it felt controlled and comfortable.

 

~~Tink

[Larsen M. Callirhoe]

thanks dr. con for nice subtle remark. :party on:

 

 

 

tinker yes i can be neat in my poetry lol. i am working on metered poetry to fine tune 75 percent of my poems. this poem might change a little bit still though lol. i am leaving out some details that i wouldve liked to add to this in another stana but it was only two and a half sentences and because i know others want to visualise on their own i cut it out instead of adding more details. i know poetry i sppose to be show not tell so stanza three i think cold be reworded still. but on the other hand people want to use their own imgination so the poem is stck in this format where i could change a word here or there in it for months. thankyou for yor kind remarks. coming from your scholarly type research it means a lot your remarks. :party on: .

victor