Thirteen Ways of Looking at 50+ Years of Poetry, 9

[David W. Parsley]

THIRTEEN WAYS OF LOOKING AT 50+ YEARS OF POETRY

 

Re-revised:

 

IX

 

So little depends

upon

 

a pitch and copper

doghouse

 

grazed by pot

holes

 

pursuant the pack

barking

 

the last blackbird

from view.

 

 

unpublished

© David W. Parsley 2011

 

Re: poems of William Carlos Williams

"The Red Wheelbarrow" http://writing.upenn.edu/~afilreis/88/wcw-red-wheel.html/

"Paterson: Preface" http://arch.ttu.edu/wiki/William_Carlos_Williams_-_Paterson/

"Fine Work with Pitch and Copper" http://andrewlansdown.com/favourite-poems/william-carlos-williams/

Revised:

 

IX

 

So much depends

upon a red doghouse

glazed with rooftiles

jouncing behind the pack

that barked the last

blackbirds out of sight.

 

 

Previous:

IX

 

So much depends

on a red doghouse

jouncing behind the pack

that barked the last

blackbirds out of sight

glazed by rainwater

at the edge of rooftiles

nailed in many circles

beside the white chickens.

[David W. Parsley]

Revised to be more minimalist, more Williams-esque.

 

- Dave

[badger11]

THIRTEEN WAYS OF LOOKING AT 50+ YEARS OF POETRY

 

Revised:

 

IX

So much depends

upon a red doghouse

glazed with rooftiles

jouncing behind the pack

that barked the last

blackbirds out of sight.

 

 

unpublished

© David W. Parsley 2011

 

Re: poems of William Carlos Williams

"The Red Wheelbarrow" http://writing.upenn.edu/~afilreis/88/wcw-red-wheel.html/

"Paterson: Preface" http://arch.ttu.edu/wiki/William_Carlos_Williams_-_Paterson/

"Fine Work with Pitch and Copper" http://andrewlansdown.com/favourite-poems/william-carlos-williams/

Previous:

IX

 

So much depends

on a red doghouse

jouncing behind the pack

that barked the last

blackbirds out of sight

glazed by rainwater

at the edge of rooftiles

nailed in many circles

beside the white chickens.

 

hi DP

 

Some discussion of WCW by members:

 

http://www.poetrymagnumopus.com/index.php?showtopic=2039

 

Perhaps you would consider some white space in shaping your poem:

 

Again so much

depends

 

upon the red

doghouse

 

etc

 

badge

[David W. Parsley]

Excellent feedback, badge! I have decided to model the structure completely after "The Red Wheelbarrow," while still nodding to the Stevens orginal and the other WCW sources. That had the benefit of freeing me to address the poetic sound elements so deftly employed by Williams in the original. Perhaps this is now becoming a "worthy parody" at last! Thanks for the suggestion and the pointer.

By the way, that was a very stimulating discussion at the link site. While I find this and other miniatures pleasing, I do not always find such rewards in WCW. I just wanted to pick on one that a lot of people would recognize.

Still, I shouldn't complain: apparently Donald Hall's discussion of the piece motivated Tinker to go on her quest for poetic form. And that benefits all of us here, no?

- Dave

[poetjohncompton]

is this poem still unpublished?!

[David W. Parsley]

Hi John, thanks for looking in on the piece.  Unfortunately, it is indeed still unpublished.  That may be due to the fact that I kept swinging for the fences back when I tried to market it several years ago, insisting on proffering the 13-section piece in its entirety.  Maybe I should dust it off and try a different approach.

Thanks Again,
- David

[badger11]

https://www.ravennapress.com/alba/submit.html

[poetjohncompton]

On 12/9/2023 at 10:10 AM, David W. Parsley said:

Hi John, thanks for looking in on the piece.  Unfortunately, it is indeed still unpublished.  That may be due to the fact that I kept swinging for the fences back when I tried to market it several years ago, insisting on proffering the 13-section piece in its entirety.  Maybe I should dust it off and try a different approach.

Thanks Again,
- David

submit the whole thing and a bio to

ghostcityreview@gmail.com 

I'm the poetry editor — below is the mag link

https://ghostcitypress.com/new-archive

[David W. Parsley]

Gladly!  Thanks for the appreciation of the piece, I like the way it fits with work that you curate for Ghost City.  I will do just as you request, probably after Christmas but before the New Year.

BTW, I like the pic carried on the magazine Masthead.  You could be holding our cat, George!

Happy Holidays!
 - David

[poetjohncompton]

5 hours ago, David W. Parsley said:

Gladly!  Thanks for the appreciation of the piece, I like the way it fits with work that you curate for Ghost City.  I will do just as you request, probably after Christmas but before the New Year.

BTW, I like the pic carried on the magazine Masthead.  You could be holding our cat, George!

Happy Holidays!
 - David

I look forward to the poem

and yes, the cat makes the pic all the better 🥰

[Tinker]

Coming in late,  just want to add,  I love this entire thread but especially the red doghouse.  I am such a WCW fan.   There is actually an invented form called the wheelbarrow

It was found at the end of Chapter 1 of Donald Hall's book.   I gave my copy of the book to someone years ago.  Recently I thought I would really like to reread it and went on line to buy it again.  It is out of print but I did find a used copy.  They wanted over $125 for it.   Consequently I did not buy it.

~~ Judi

 

[David W. Parsley]

Well, shiver me timbers, Judi, I had no idea such a form existed.  Count on you, though, to bring a well-timed insight to PMO readers and commentators.  Since the form explicitly calls for eight lines, mine must be disqualified for going a stanza too far, despite similar cadence, line length, and phrasing.  On the last point, I must confess to being particularly (and naughtily) pleased with "grazed" sonically and comically substituted for WCW's "glazed" in stanza 3.

And since we're talking about naughtiness and unseemly impudence toward some of our most respected poets, it should be noted that, when paired with the corresponding section in Stevens, one may achieve an implied sense of scatology in the narrative of the startled fowl. 

Just for Fun,
 - David