eclipse Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 A dead whale crossed the earth, guided by the dark bells in the cathedrals of gravity on fire. He passed through me on a bridge built from the ashes of a dream. I rebuilt the whale from the glass echo of his song and became his passenger journeying through the seas,a harpoon, broke us into fragments,scattering us across the seabed. Quote
David W. Parsley Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 This one had me by the throat until the closing lines. Something dissipated that wasn't ready to (poetically). The preceding nine lines are as effective as anything you have written, Eclipse. Your originality knocks my old blackbird back on his tailfeathers! - Dave Quote
Tinker Posted October 8, 2011 Posted October 8, 2011 Hi Eclipse, My mind was kind of struggling to capture the images of the first few lines, but the "bridge of ashes" is brilliant. For me the 2nd strophe was where I settled in and felt it. Nice. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com
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