eclipse Posted November 7, 2011 Posted November 7, 2011 My grandfather would listen to the Hornsea evening tides he would compare them to incantations where ecstasy resides grandmother complained that her husband was never really home he compared wood to the soul in death searching for a form a carpenter-he built my sister a dollhouse and me a horse grandfather heard the grass growing he understood it's force he would stare into the dolls house and share his visions that night winds would blow the cottage free of it's fictions On her last night grandmother opened the window and heard the sea that night her husband finally arrived home and she for eternity he would make wings for the horse and build a boat-his last creation sailing at night he muttered his wife's name like an incantation sleeping till morning the wind would carry his dreams in its suitcase staring into the dolls house he watched grandmothers sleeping face Quote
abstract Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 a touching piece. kind of mystical, wistful, mournful and hopeful all at once. i like this line, for its look into his unique thoughts : he compared wood to the soul in death searching for a form Quote
Benjamin Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 I agree with Abstract re: “touching, mystical,wistful, mournful and hopeful all at once”. I felt it could have been further enhanced by conventional punctuation, although, that's just my own preference in this particular case. Benjamin Quote
Tinker Posted November 9, 2011 Posted November 9, 2011 Hi Eclipse, This is a beautiful Couplets Sonnet. We both chose to use this form to deliver a memory of our grandparents. I thought that interesting. I like your memory better though. It captures the who of them. It is really lovely. Could I include your poem as an example of the form? ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com
eclipse Posted November 9, 2011 Author Posted November 9, 2011 hello tinker-yes please include it Quote
Tinker Posted November 9, 2011 Posted November 9, 2011 Thanks, I think being able to include good poetry written by poets other than myself enriches the articles which are being found more and more through google searches by those interested in poetic form. I just recently ran across a iink to our PMO Forms forum used by a professor at the University of Maryland as a resource for his students. Thanks again. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com
David W. Parsley Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 Hi Eclipse, I like the poem. I like the form. Curiously, I actually find the lack of punctuation a player in how the poem means, in this case. Not my usual preference. Tinker, I am tickled that the resource is finding broader use. As you may recall, the Poetic Forms area is what first attracted me to PMO as well. - Dave Quote
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