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Posted

My grandfather would listen to the Hornsea evening tides

he would compare them to incantations where ecstasy resides

grandmother complained that her husband was never really home

he compared wood to the soul in death searching for a form

a carpenter-he built my sister a dollhouse and me a horse

grandfather heard the grass growing he understood it's force

he would stare into the dolls house and share his visions

that night winds would blow the cottage free of it's fictions

On her last night grandmother opened the window and heard the sea

that night her husband finally arrived home and she for eternity

he would make wings for the horse and build a boat-his last creation

sailing at night he muttered his wife's name like an incantation

sleeping till morning the wind would carry his dreams in its suitcase

staring into the dolls house he watched grandmothers sleeping face

Posted

a touching piece. kind of mystical, wistful, mournful and hopeful all at once.

 

i like this line, for its look into his unique thoughts :

 

he compared wood to the soul in death searching for a form

Posted

I agree with Abstract re: “touching, mystical,wistful, mournful and hopeful all at once”. I felt it could have been further enhanced by conventional punctuation, although, that's just my own preference in this particular case. Benjamin

Posted

Hi Eclipse, This is a beautiful Couplets Sonnet. We both chose to use this form to deliver a memory of our grandparents. I thought that interesting. I like your memory better though. It captures the who of them. It is really lovely. Could I include your poem as an example of the form?

 

~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

Posted

Thanks, I think being able to include good poetry written by poets other than myself enriches the articles which are being found more and more through google searches by those interested in poetic form. I just recently ran across a iink to our PMO Forms forum used by a professor at the University of Maryland as a resource for his students. Thanks again.

 

~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

David W. Parsley
Posted

Hi Eclipse,

 

I like the poem. I like the form. Curiously, I actually find the lack of punctuation a player in how the poem means, in this case. Not my usual preference.

 

Tinker, I am tickled that the resource is finding broader use. As you may recall, the Poetic Forms area is what first attracted me to PMO as well.

 

- Dave

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