eclipse Posted March 23, 2012 Posted March 23, 2012 Ivan the tattooed ferryman's journey is short and intoxicating as he shimmers to the mermaid's song. The boatman chauffeurs to collect buckets of change to tempt a siren within his range-Ivan fails throws the coins into the water and makes a wish-a moon with eyes of fire to observe the waters while a ferryman sleeps and to serve a mermaid's lure with flames of red-a siren creates a wish the silver satellite has a tongue to sing and brings Ivan's tattoos to life- on a tongue they dance-eyes they close- the mermaid's song raises the ferryman to the tip of a righteous tongue. Quote
tonyv Posted March 23, 2012 Posted March 23, 2012 I always liked those mermaids and sirens, Eclipse. But I can't say I was ever excited to pay the ferryman, lol. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic
tonyv Posted March 23, 2012 Posted March 23, 2012 Yes. It's lyrical, sonnetlike, wistful ... three characteristics I like very much. Oh, and quite original, too. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic
Larsen M. Callirhoe Posted March 23, 2012 Posted March 23, 2012 this is a classic well-rounded poem barry. very original and highly entertaining to say the least. victor Quote Larsen M. Callirhoe
eclipse Posted April 7, 2012 Author Posted April 7, 2012 would anyone like to vote for my ferryman poem here-thanks-barry http://www.trendmicro.co.uk/wys-uk/ Quote
Benjamin Posted April 9, 2012 Posted April 9, 2012 I enjoyed reading this: your language is aptly colourful and a choice of “Ivan” for the tattooed ferryman unusual. With so much detail packed into the later lines however, I confess-- I became a little confused after line 10 . But that's just me. Benjamin Quote
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