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Poetry Magnum Opus

Inennan


dedalus
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I want to hold you

but I cannot hold you …

not in front of a policeman

not when the lights are turning green

not when people are looking

not when your eyes are shining

not when a cough is coming

not when a war still rages

not when the climate changes

not when children are sad and hungry

 

unless perhaps when it rains

and we can smile in one another’s eyes

and hide under a big umbrella

 

but the people will bump into us

from before and behind and say,

move along, move along, move along!

Drown your sorrows in drink, by all means, but the real sorrows can swim

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Wow Brendan, Love the surprise imagery and the repetition that moves the reader along. This is a feel good poem that warms the heart. No conflict here, the last stanza brings this lovely moment into the real world with ease and grace. This is so nice to read and feel. Thanks.

 

~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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Hey Brendan, Tinker! Brendan- I love this- It captures a certain mood I've lived (am living) perfectly;-) Tink hate to disagree it is all conflict and tension- The failure to just reach out and be human unless... And then the result is Move along;-) Although I agree it is a feel good poem.... Brilliant!

 

DC&J

thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules.

 

Gate(less.png

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Hi DC and Brendan, I probably should have used the word "focus" rather than "conflict". I was referring to the path of the poet leading the reader to and through an emotion which is an extension of a previous discussion with Brendan. There was no conflict here in the sense that the poet knew exactly where when and how he wanted to lead the reader. As you said DC, brilliant.

 

~~Tink

~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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David W. Parsley

Good one, Brendan. It features a complete absence of self pity or indulgence, no pulpit banging. Just the ethos of lovers who want to build what lovers have always wanted - a safe place to nurture, enjoy, and preserve each other and what exists between them - but with a sense of threatening forces, among them the flow of life, the normal hubbub that can destroy as surely as a tsunami.

 

- David

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