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So many days


Larsen M. Callirhoe

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Larsen M. Callirhoe

So many days

 

 

So many days i looked into the mirror

i saw a reflection of a crying child.

So many nights i looked out the window

looking at the many distant stars.

 

one night the moon talked to me.

she was so happy to talk to me.

she said like me she felt all abandoned

and alone

 

So many nights i cried aloud

and prayed to the holy spirit

the mother goddess of all.

i said i no longer want to be alone

and live my life of shattered dreams

and paralysis destined to die alone.

 

I had a dream that said i would walk

again on june 6 2018.

can i be so patient as the doctors

look for a cure to my disability.

 

alone i cry many tears

drifting in and out of many realities.

i want to walk again and dance on the clouds,

 

why can't my dreams be fulfilled.

a shootung star passed by my home one day.

i wished i could hold your hand again

and hope you would say i love you.

 

this is what i have wanted to hear

my whole life.

why do you find it hard to say i love you

yet you said i do and married me one day.

 

was it all a lie or one of my fantasies.

all alone i sing a spiritual song.

in my mind a float along the river

hoping my words help

would ring out to you.

 

most of all i wanted children with you

because you are so beautiful.

i wish my heart could be as patient

as yours is regarding me.

 

So many nights i would dream of you.

I would whisper the words to you

asking you to marry me.

I would always say to you

how much i love you.

 

i wish i could dance with you

under the moonlight

and have the mighty angels seranade us.

 

So many days i would write you poetry

hoping i could touch your heart

once again with the passionate words

i write and say to you.

 

many years have passed as i wait for you

to grow up and mature and blossom into a lady.

one day i would bring you flowers

and ask you to marry me in the distant future.

 

i would have the great budda christ marry us.

we would make love under the moonlight

as she the moon sang to us.

 

she would be a full circle that night

glowing on us.

 

So many nights i would pray for this moment

as i drifted asleep

hoping we would never drift apart.

I would sing you a love song.

the words would be so bitter sweet.

 

you dream of me as your prince

and i think of you as my queen to be.

 

i love you this is my heart elizabeth.

what more do you want from me.

i worship the ground you walk upon

and the flesh on your body

like you are divine.

 

even in your wisdom and age

i still want to make love to you.

can your heart take eternity with me

my beloved rose.

Larsen M. Callirhoe

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Aleksandra

I read this poem more and more Vic. It is so sad poem. I know with what kind of feelings you are writing this, and thats why it makes me more sad. I wished me to be able to make your dream come true.

And Vic you know, always my prayers are with you my friend.

 

Aleksandra

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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Aleksandra

BW Vic I forgot to say. The last line my beloved rose. is wonderful. Metaphorically you handled with this one, on the best way

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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goldenlangur

Hi Victor,

 

Here in this poem, the reader gets a sense of how despite your physical and emotional pain and suffering, your heart still sings for the one person you love.:

 

"alone i cry many tears

drifting in and out of many realities.

i want to walk again and dance on the clouds..."

 

In this search for a healing of heart and body you turn to the moon, the Mother Goddess and in your dreams of being blessed by the "Buddha Christ" you reach out for a universal ideal, which is very moving.

 

 

May your prayers be answered and your courage and strong spirit rewarded.

 

 

goldenlangur

goldenlangur

 

 

Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying.

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I like the trope about the moon --

one night the moon talked to me.

she was so happy to talk to me.

she said like me she felt all abandoned

and alone

-- and also the one about your dream:

I had a dream that said i would walk

again on june 6 2018.

can i be so patient as the doctors

look for a cure to my disability.

The specificity of the date in the part about your dream exhibits a painful reality. It's almost like when someone predicts the day the world is going to end -- it could happen, but we have to wait for the actual date to arrive in order to know.

 

And Alek is right: my beloved rose is lovely.

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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