eclipse Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 Death is rowing, roving, ready with an open bottle to claim this ship as it slouches into port avoiding his grip. Inside a tavern sewing with eyes closed her singing echoes through thin windows, death bottles a deaf child's song, her mariner Father arrives with gifts, rings of silver she accepts, refusing gold. Amongst offerings are ear rings of the moon hung hastily on the ears of a dear daughter. The Father is silent unlike the sea, he returns to the waters, she utters a melody into a shell and death slyly waits for a ship he is lured by shanty's from a shell, her silver tears tumble. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Sewing with eyes closed ... haunting. I loved the variety of symbolism. There's the ship in the bottle, the acceptance of silver and refusal of gold, moon earrings, father/daughter and the more abstract "death." All of it's a curious maritime/witchy blend. Loved death/deaf, too. Nice work, Barry. You regularly put forth fresh stuff. This one's one of your more intriguing poems. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David W. Parsley Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 Barry, I second Tony's comments. The activities of Death in the poem provoke a response mixing alarm and fascination. I lose the thread of action in the closing lines but am still drawn back. - Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 sewing with eyes closed I agree with Tony there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
douglas Posted April 6, 2013 Share Posted April 6, 2013 surreal, beautiful and sinister - really good! Quote To receive love, you have to give it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted April 6, 2013 Share Posted April 6, 2013 Hi Barry this is provocative. And yes as the others I was struck by "sewing with eyes closed", what a great phrase it almost jumps out of the poem. Nice. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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