Poorformance Poet

[Frank E Gibbard]

Heard about this sonnet writer with this problem

enumerate chap could not count up to fourteen.

He gilded his verses with thees, thous and thines

though he saw a poem of perfection reality fell a

mite in between. No matter how exquisite wording

might be they lacked the requisite number of lines.

Frustrated he decided to switch his selected form

but all the two line haikus and three line cinquains

penned did not sadly conform to the poetry world's

pedantic expectations. A quintissential piece of art

he fathered he pared, the essence of romance caught

he thought, down to minimum as this his curt couplet

goes: "Shall I compare thee." "Oh!" readers retort

not only plagiaristic but one vital essential line short

"Couplet indeed! There's another wee bit," they snort,

"needed," especially the Scots, "Rabbi'd hoot yer oot

of our hoose you goose ay McGonigle hisself e'en he

would be ashamed." Under kilts they were getting a bit

hottish and unlikely to be able to sustain this strain of

cod-Scottish any longer. Ah returning to the brief and

with some relief, oh yes our amateur poet - remember

if you will his enumeracy, well pentameter's all askew,

wrote like in his legs he had three left feet or even four.

Give a meter take a meter he was completely meritless,

mixed metric and imperial and every useless metaphor.

[dr_con]

OMG!Brilliant and I must say everyone has given me a chuckle this morning thus far. And to that what a great start to the Day!

 

 

Thanks Frank,

 

Juris

[Benjamin]

Been back at least twice to this Frank the humour is infectious.

[dcmarti1]

I can't get past how ingenious the title is. :)

[Gatekeeper]

Enjoying the attitude in:

 

"Under kilts they were getting a bit

hottish and unlikely to be able to sustain this strain of

cod-Scottish any longer."

[Tinker]

LOL Frank, This should be the intro to the Explore the Craft of Writing section... All poets should take this to heart and not take ourselves too seriously.

 

~~Tink