Bloodyday Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 Pausing my feelings, the GPS gets my attention Unable to decrypt from my heart’s translation How my emotions carrying the loneliness For thousands mourns, my miseries obsess From long distance I am hearing you voice Shaking with colorless tears without grace! Do you know I am sighting a beautiful view Letting my blood mixing with the land’s hue! Trying to let you know: I am glad to meet you For your tears, nothing else I could do! Sun blazes its glory over the war so dirty Bullet roars the suffocation claiming so filthy Brutality it brings, the apocalypse begins With the religion for supremacy that gifts Nothing but the war so soar with the blast Of C4. Cry flies in broken wings without cast I am nothing but another worthless merchant I am hit having mass, but tried to fix! Sun will be red when it dawns at six I am enjoying my vital signs disappear Darling, I don’t want to watch you despair! Won’t you know, I am happy to meet you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoelJosol Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 Your poem has a mix vocabulary of violence and elation. War is indeed ugly, escpecially, for selfish gain. Quote "Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 An ambitious work, Rony. Within it, you have incorporated some well-devised rhymes and some remarkably vivid, original expressions. Modern GPS assisted warfare combined with proven C4 still yields old-fashioned suffering, and the narrator's unexpected gamut of emotions, along with an unusual undercurrent ("I am glad to meet you"), causes that suffering to rain down on the reader like napalm! Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 18, 2009 Author Share Posted May 18, 2009 Hi Joel Ya, War is ugly and we all hate this war. But won't you know we always vote for war? and this is the reason the warlords reign the world! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 18, 2009 Author Share Posted May 18, 2009 Hi tony Yesterday i saw in CNN/BBC, Michigan, Ohio inhabitants are suffering from the sack problem and company lay out. hundreds and thousands of people are living under the margin of poverty like the third world. i assume that this is the war that creates all these and these are the warlords and corrupted ones we elected again and again knowing that they are all the same! i think that human being are all the same wherever they live. The shrewd ones always dismantles the peace and we love to see the death of our beloved one! this is called modern humanity! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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