dcmarti1 Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 the odd cardinaland stray bluebird find their restin a dying hedgewhile the heavy limbsof andrew johnson's tree bendfrom weighty spring rainswhile the street-side carsare parked in both directionsthis quiet sunday (Dupont is a neighborhood in the north-west quadrant of Washington, DC. These 3 stanzas form one sentence: not exactly a strict haiku. Sorry.) REVISION 1 (Taking Dave's critique into consideration, changed the verb tenses. Odd and stray were used as adjectives because most of the chirpping and flapping in the hedge were from black, brown, gray little wee birds, finches? The cardinal and bluejay were STRIKINGLY beautiful in the hedge.) the odd cardinaland stray bluebird found their restin a dying hedgewhile the heavy limbsof andrew johnson's tree bentfrom weighty spring rainswhile the street-side carswere parked in both directionson quiet sundays Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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