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changeling


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The night wears my lover like a jewel, they both wear a single pearl. Her beauty is full and equal to that of the moons. A changeling, daylight pearl- we orbit her loveliness until the moon arrives to impress it's majesty.

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...until the moon arrives to impress its majesty.

 

One word: wow.

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  • 2 weeks later...
David W. Parsley

...until the moon arrives to impress its majesty.

 

One word: wow.

Not to be contrary, but that is the one part of poem I found out of place. I otherwise very much like the diction and pulse, the way the piece moves, the sense of devoted fascination, even obsession. What if that last phrase (lovely as it is) were simply removed and saved for usage in a different piece?

 

Nice!

- Dave

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  • 2 months later...
poetjohncompton

The night wears my lover like a jewel, they both wear a single pearl.

 

i love this part. this is good.

misterpoet

 

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