Tinker Posted December 15, 2015 Share Posted December 15, 2015 Poet's Quill - revision Wonder of words ignite this quest from time forgot to time unguessed. Charmed be the quill of light, Charmed be the poet's plight. Plots placed in words for all to read of creeds and deeds with bardic seeds. Charmed be the quill of light, Charmed be the poet's plight. From the god within new chants emerge, a cry, a sigh, a soulful purge. Charmed be the poet's plight Charmed be the quill of light. . . . . . ~~Judi Van Gorder Charmed. - original Wonder of words ignite this quest from time forgot to time unknown. Charmed is the quill of light, Charmed is the poet's plight. Plots placed in words upon a page of creeds and deeds with bardic seeds. Charmed is the quill of light, Charmed is the poet's plight. From the god within new chants emerge, a cry, a sigh, a soulful purge. Charmed is the poet's plight Charmed is the quill of light. Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 Charmed be the quill of light, Love the notion of a 'quill of light'. I think writing comes at different speeds Tink. I try to write two poems per month minimum - depending on work commitments. My intention is not to let the writing become an 'outpour' ; or on the other hand I would not want to become silent by becoming too self-critical of its imperfections. Always a difficult balance. A quiet forum may fade away, but a busy one may overwhelm with noise - a socialising rather than writing forum. Just some thoughts. badge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 16, 2015 Author Share Posted December 16, 2015 Thanks badge, it is a rewrite of an example poem I wrote to demonstrate the genre Charms. By stengthening the rhyme and changing the tense of the refrain I think the poem has been improved. I'm trying to capture that magic of invoking a charm. At this point I'm revisiting old poems and rewriting a lot. Especially poems I wrote as examples of form or genre. Most of them were buried in the reference section with no feedback. Revisiting with a polished eye, I'm adjusting a word or two and or changing a line or punctuation. When they were written I often just wanted to demonstrate the form or genre. Now I'm looking at them as poems needing polish. I would like them to be better poetry in their own right separate from the form. I've learned a lot over the years and I can use that knowledge to improve my older writing. I do attempt to haiku most days just to stay in the groove, But I also miss some of the old members. I hope to see some more poetry here. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 At this point I'm revisiting old poems and rewriting a lot. Especially poems I wrote as examples of form or genre. Most of them were buried in the reference section with no feedback. Revisiting with a polished eye, I'm adjusting a word or two and or changing a line or punctuation. When they were written I often just wanted to demonstrate the form or genre. Now I'm looking at them as poems needing polish. I would like them to be better poetry in their own right separate from the form. Hi Tink, It would be interesting if you posted the original with the revision. As you know, I am always interested the 'evolution' of a poem. all the best badge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank E Gibbard Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 charmingly put in your quiet style, a quintessence of quillwomanship I'd sayTink Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 A poetry is essentially a spell -- and indeed this is! Loved your reworking Tink, really a lovely piece. Juris Quote thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 17, 2015 Author Share Posted December 17, 2015 Ok badge I added the original for you to see. Not big changes but I think they changed the whole feel of the poem. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 17, 2015 Author Share Posted December 17, 2015 Ah Frank you make my heart smile. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 17, 2015 Author Share Posted December 17, 2015 Thank you so much DC. Yes all good poetry should be magic. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted December 17, 2015 Share Posted December 17, 2015 Ok badge I added the original for you to see. Not big changes but I think they changed the whole feel of the poem. ~~Tink Particularly like the tweak to 'unguessed' - more music in the edit. cheers badge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 17, 2015 Author Share Posted December 17, 2015 Thanks badge, I wish I could take credit for that tweek but it was suggested to me by someone else. I agree it was perfect for me and I ran with it. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bob Posted December 19, 2015 Share Posted December 19, 2015 Like a true poet...a poem when completed and posted, then revisited at a later time with a fresh outlook, will most always find room for improvement; like the honing of a knife blade... You will stroke it softly to near perfection. I like it. YarnSpinner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 19, 2015 Author Share Posted December 19, 2015 What a nice thing to say Yarnspinner. Yep I am tinkering with my poems lol of the time. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted December 21, 2015 Share Posted December 21, 2015 Thanks badge, I wish I could take credit for that tweek but it was suggested to me by someone else. I agree it was perfect for me and I ran with it. ~~Tink But you listened Tink! Not everyone does - except to their own voice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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