Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 My world comes crushing down But I still sit behind Trying to listen to the breeze Passing me by Waiting for the dawn and perhaps the rain lonely day I embrace a lot my miseries wanton yesterday you were beautiful having same shiny face expecting a baby and a new smile is it a dream or a reality for me? Tasting my tears salty all the same May be tomorrow Or the life after another I will play the game wise……. I am still in melancholy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldenlangur Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi RoNy, Laden with the anguish of a broken heart, this poem! Not even nature in all its guises - 'breeze, rain, dawn' can give any respite. You capture the pain well. But I like how you end with the hope that perhaps tomorrow will be different; May be tomorrow Or the life after another I will play the game wise… I hope so, my friend. goldenlangur …. Quote goldenlangur Even a single enemy is too many and a thousand friends too few - Bhutanese saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lake Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Rony, This poem has such a raw feeling. Life goes on, tomorrow will be better. All the best, Lake Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I like this heartbreaking poem Rony. Your melancholy can be seen through your poem. You should remember that everything what is happening, it is for a reason. God knows what he do. Look up to the next morning, not that you are going to play wise only, but because God always have something else for us, after some storm. Keep your faith and be positive. And also keep your writing, that always helps. I liked your poem a lot, Rony. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoelJosol Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 'Yesterday'. That's a heavy word in this poem, BD. Quote "Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi Rony, The title works well. It led me to believe the poem would be positive, but there's only a glimmer of hope, and that's in the last line. Yes, Maybe tomorrow ... Here's an old one of mine ... for you. Rx The summer doesn't miss the spring it is what it is: it's its own Perhaps it's okay to hide for awhile, invisible like winter in the middle of July Maybe goodbye would be okay maybe today Good to see you. Things will get better! Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi TonyV i know things will change, but don't when! perhaps it takes so long and this matter is taking the test of my temper and patience. But your poem is the example of excellent piece of work. The summer doesn't miss the spring this line shows the inevitability of the regular causality of rationalism and it has a certain time frame to accomplish. nice instance. it is what it is: it's its own then it follows with a rhythmic line and expression depicted as a "Long time issue" of our known world. Perhaps it's okay to hide for awhile, invisible like winter in the middle of July but this regular option offers some options to live in alternative way of escapism from the thing one wants but depression strikes as one couldn't get it which is also a regular phenomena of nature and only few people can get it, perhaps. Maybe goodbye would be okay maybe today may be in frustration or not, decision comes for everybody's good but it possesses some grim which strikes a lot. in a nutshell, all the excellent verses touch my mind...... thanks for your beautiful creation! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 hi goldenlangur we lead a life of great certainty and we come to understand when something hurts. i remember a song of REM titled as Everybody hearts. ya, i think this worthless optimism will drives me further to live on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi Lake thanks for your optimistic comment and i wish you were true! but i don't know when it comes................... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi Aleksandra Nice thoughts, but one question: can everybody forget the feelings he felt very deep? i know we need to compromise, but some issues can't be resolved and i know GOD is a mighty player, ofcourse! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi joel how heavy it is........i think physics can't answer !!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Thank you for the kind words about my poem, Rony. I wanted to share it with you. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Hi Aleksandra Nice thoughts, but one question: can everybody forget the feelings he felt very deep? i know we need to compromise, but some issues can't be resolved and i know GOD is a mighty player, ofcourse! The answer is - Never. You can't forget ever Rony, but for sure, the power of the feelings, or the power ofthe pain what someone feel in the moment would be powerfulness. It wont hurts this much. For that, you need to help too, with faith and looking forward for a new light. I think even now, you sound better and less sad, am I right? ALeksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 I think even now, you sound better and less sad, am I right? i tried to catch it out.....nice vacation i enjoyed (Eid Ul Azha), some more vacations to come (our day of Independence 16 th December, 25th December, our national election 29th December),but still i don't know what i am doing. sometimes i like to take revenge sometimes i forbid myself to do wrong. the definition of mental disorder, i don't know, but trying to recover. you are right....i won't forget the memories and perhaps these are the memories which byte like snake every time. Thanx for your nice answer, Alek! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lake Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Bloodyday wrote: how heavy it is........i think physics can't answer !!!!!! That's a cute answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodyday Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 welcome TonyV Lake cute is the haiku cute is the question cuter is nothing but feel like you, man! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.