eclipse Posted January 15, 2017 Share Posted January 15, 2017 Their is a ladder of my shadows reaching the moon as I am laid in earth, they lower his heart placing it in my chest and I am allowed to walk amongst the living whose spirits walk on the moon contained within this heart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David W. Parsley Posted January 22, 2017 Share Posted January 22, 2017 Great start to this one, Barry. For me it falls a little off-rail starting with "I am allowed.." But what an image: "ladder of my shadows"! How about something more like, "I see the last rung touch the moon as I am laid..."? Just a thought. All the Best, - Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benjamin Posted January 26, 2017 Share Posted January 26, 2017 Interesting surreal incarnation. Unusual choice re: “his heart” in that many of the most well-known lunar deities are female; although male lunar gods are also frequent. Also really like "ladder of my shadows". The piece is open to interpretation and there are people who believe that alien life forms exist on the dark side of the moon :-) Enjoyed.. although you might want to change that first word to “There”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted February 9, 2017 Share Posted February 9, 2017 Barry, I wish I could tap into my muse to write word art like this. I love the imagery in this piece. And yes "ladder of my shadows" beautiful. Note: There not Their I know with spell check these things often get over looked, but . . .~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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