summayya Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Friday Far away someone screams to his God. The sun is off to neverland today. Prayers ripple through the vast void of time and settle at the bottom. You are distant like the priest who knows not what he wants; and sleep runs like a disease through my nights. * Friday is a sacred day in Islam. A day for special prayers. Its like Sunday is for christians. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Wow, Awe-sum-mayya! Paints a clear picture, with surrealist images, that are at once simple observations and incredible well chosen complex images: and sleep runs like a disease through my nights As an example, simply astounding. I do not think it is necessary to point out the significance of Friday, of course that's just my opinion, but one either knows, doesn't but is swept away anyhow, or the enviable third option, which one finds out and some time later the poem completes itself in the reader- "oh that's why it was Friday" Much Grace, DC Quote thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 I like how Far off is offset by You are distant, which, together with the priest who knows not what he wants, is very Hopkins-esque. Of course, as has already been noted, the last line is quite potent. Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
summayya Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 Thanks DC and tony. Your comments and suggestions are always percpetive and much appreciated. Much thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleksandra Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Wonderful poem Summayya, as a screaming in silence. The metaphor with the priest, works perfectly. I love this poem. Aleksandra Quote The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau History of Macedonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
summayya Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 Thanks alek. Glad you enjoyed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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