dr_con Posted December 21, 2019 Share Posted December 21, 2019 Solstice 12/21/19 For a time every Solstice put in a poetic bell - jar as if _____ it could ____ be pinned later in a velvet lined box wings spread a color frozen concrete cast against --- nightsky --- Absolute But now with the infinite behind it All short est and longest never really mattered only the coming and going Is a dim Relative to the Big ___ Big ___ Brilliance our Sun’s spiral passage reflects to us all. Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted December 22, 2019 Share Posted December 22, 2019 Enjoyed the day, the poem, and the message. The days are getting longer and I feel that spring is on its way. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinker Posted December 23, 2019 Share Posted December 23, 2019 Ah, Why didn’t I think of that? Loved this, I wish I wrote it. ~~Tink Quote ~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~ For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted December 25, 2019 Author Share Posted December 25, 2019 TY! Tony & Judi -- Happiest holidays, and my gosh Tinker, very High compliment;-) Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dcmarti1 Posted December 26, 2019 Share Posted December 26, 2019 "the infinite behind it all" So mystic, so rosicrucian, so christian. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted December 26, 2019 Author Share Posted December 26, 2019 Ty Marti! Quote thegateless.org Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A. Baez Posted December 31, 2019 Share Posted December 31, 2019 Juris, I was moved by this from the very first time I read it, awhile ago now! What a novel concept to equate a solstice with a nature specimen--I find it quite, well, captivating! Your choices of words throughout this piece are precisionistically apt and emotionally evocative. You waste nothing. I love the dashes and capitals, which harness these hallmark Dickinsonian techniques in a really sensitive way; and the underscores, which seem like some contemporary version of the dashes. I'd be interested to know how you decided to use those--are they are trend in contemporary poetry? How do you see them as functioning differently than dashes? You're the expert in this arena! Anyway, both punctuation styles lead me to pause in ways that really feel appropriate. Also, I love the irony of the phrase, "with the infinite behind it." And the enjambment of "short/est" is such a nice touch--how cool to make this one stanza two lines longer than all the rest! My logic wanted to read "the coming and going is only a dim Relative," but I'm not sure that's really the meaning you intend. In contrast, "Only the coming and going is a dim Relative" leads me to wonder, "And what is not a dim Relative"? Sorry if I'm getting too analytical for your taste here. To resume with the raves, I love "Big_Big_Brilliance"--it brings home this whole poem's sense of awe. This is a really focused, delicate, memorable piece. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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