Dismantling You and Me

[JoelJosol]

The instruction was

in the one page manual,

 

of us in pieces

and disassembled.

 

After inventory of all the parts,

of wood and screws,

 

we located where we need

to hold fast together.

 

We were happy then

with what we have put together.

 

Today, with a different tool set

on the floor

 

we pull out each screw,

as in a rush,

 

uncaring if we damage

the threads

 

or splinter the wood

or hurt ourselves.

 

We just want

to be dismantled quickly.

[dr_con]

Deconstructionist at its best!

 

The sentiment, is well crafted the metaphor sound, I am already projecting into the future, where memory carefully polishes the wood, tools are only necessary due to disaster or life's strains- or the mad search @ Ikea or e-bay for a replacement- insightful and brilliant as always;-)

 

DC

[rumisong]

I love this one!

 

Today, we brought the manual

out again,

 

with a different tool set

on the floor.

 

this bit, perfect

[Lake]

I like it. It sounds like dismantling, that doesn't need much care, goes faster than assembling, just as quick as how your short lines went.

[tonyv]

I can appreciate how you follow up the part Rumisong pointed out with this:

We pulled out each screw,

as in a rush,

 

uncaring if we damage

the threads

 

or splinter the wood ...

I know the feeling ... What a shame.

 

Tony

[JoelJosol]

Rumisong, the part of bringing out the manual was raised as unnecessary given the disregard for the way it was dismantled. It's a valid point so I dropped it. Although it was a nice transition point.

[rumisong]

^{JoelJosol wrote:}

 

Rumisong, the part of bringing out the manual was raised as unnecessary given the disregard for the way it was dismantled. It's a valid point so I dropped it. Although it was a nice transition point.

 

to me, it might be unnecessary if what we were really discussing was the correct way to assemble and disassemble an entertainment center from a department store... but Im under the impression that what we are discussing in this poem is a relationship- and relationships are messy- we do things often that we know we "ought" to do, but still with complete disregard to the safety of the other, or oneself- so, "bringing out the manual" was giving voice to the participants best intentions at the beginning of their "dismantling" phase, for not hurting the other- but the intention is not always the reality... the reality being

We pulled out each screw,

as in a rush,

 

uncaring if we damage

the threads

 

I stand by my original take: that part was perfect!

[Frank E Gibbard]

Well assembled metaphor and good use of the poetic to illustrate the human narrative Joel.

[JoelJosol]

Now, that I heard your reading of it, I concur. There is always a desire to let it go gently at the outset.

[Aleksandra]

Very deep poem Joel. The metaphor here works well. The poem has a tact, a sense, and two sides with you standing in between.

 

Very clever Joel. I love it.

 

Aleksandra

[JoelJosol]

Thank you, too, Aleks.