learning to love my new body

[poetjohncompton]

my body: a wet temple. exploration 

goes almost mute,

decades pass before someone realizes:

beauty    in thick form

 

is beauty - is real - is natural.

is not bone but coral. is not

the puddle drying daily in the sun

but ocean

 

hungry & fierce &

organic. 

my body has a multitude of hieroglyphics 

scratched across its walls:

 

not stretch marks. 

 

rub along the soft hairs

& feel the curves turn your fingers.

press against my lips    

& become tender. 

[A. Baez]

This poem has a nice flow, a focus and terseness that gives the reader a sense of the poet's control.

I was a bit confused by the metaphors is S2 and the hieroglyphics reference in S3.

The ending is unexpected and vivid.

[dcmarti1]

Fierce. Actually, FIERCE.

[tonyv]

John, this is good work. I like the sense of "what you see is what you get" delivered by this poem.

Nice to see you,

Tony

[poetjohncompton]

On 1/4/2020 at 10:41 PM, A. Baez said:

This poem has a nice flow, a focus and terseness that gives the reader a sense of the poet's control.

I was a bit confused by the metaphors is S2 and the hieroglyphics reference in S3.

The ending is unexpected and vivid.

thank you very much! glad you found the ending wild and unexpected!

the metaphors in line two mean: coral reefs are beautiful. my body is made of them. and I am an ocean, just just the puddle that comes and goes.

and the hieroglyphics are meaning that my body does not hold ugly stretch marks but beautiful drawings.

[poetjohncompton]

On 1/5/2020 at 12:11 PM, dcmarti1 said:

Fierce. Actually, FIERCE.

thank you grandly! so happy you thought so!

[poetjohncompton]

On 1/6/2020 at 6:30 PM, tonyv said:

John, this is good work. I like the sense of "what you see is what you get" delivered by this poem.

Nice to see you,

Tony

I'm so honored you remembered me. I've been away with life lately. and growing more in my poetry. it's been a ride.

glad you enjoyed and glad you're glad to see me hehe 

[dr_con]

Yes Mister Poetry! Glad to see you! And love this fleshed construction a piece of real beauty and a wonderful re-claiming.

Many Thanks

Doc 

[A. Baez]

Quote

the metaphors in line two mean: coral reefs are beautiful. my body is made of them. and I am an ocean, just just the puddle that comes and goes.

and the hieroglyphics are meaning that my body does not hold ugly stretch marks but beautiful drawings.

That is what I imagined. I just found these references to be less clear as they might be.

Quote

beauty    in thick form

 

is beauty - is real - is natural.

is not bone but coral. is not

the puddle drying daily in the sun

but ocean

 

hungry & fierce &

organic. 

my body has a multitude of hieroglyphics 

scratched across its walls:

 

not stretch marks. 

First of all, your contention is that the body (or at least yours) is beautiful, but one of the components of the body is bone, which you imply is unbeautiful, unlike coral--something that is most definitely not part of the body.

Secondly, you then introduce another comparison between two elements, but in this comparison, neither element is found, as such, in the body--a puddle and an ocean. As a reader, I expect to find a direct parallel between your two pairs of allusions, but that is absent here.

Finally...what "beautiful drawings" does your skin hold? Assuming that this is a figurative reference (and not a reference to tattoos or doodles), I think its subject needs to be more clear. Otherwise, part of me wonders whether you are simply reimagining your stretch marks as "beautiful drawings." Alternatively (as is apparently the case), you are referring to something else (perhaps other crease marks?) and implicitly rejecting stretch marks as categorically unbeautiful. However, this hypothesis seems to run at odds with the spirit of the rest of your poem, which at least to me suggests a wholehearted, unqualified embrace of not only your body, but human bodies in general.

[Tinker]

My how you have grown as a poet, as a person.  Hard to believe you were that teenager when I first encountered your work, full of undisciplined angst and passion.  Now you are a man, comfortable in your skin and exhibit a skilled discipline.  Nice work MP.  

~~Judi