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Poetry Magnum Opus

We wait to cross the crowd


JTParreira
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We wait to cross the crowd

on the beach, we cross arms

photographic legs, breasts

raised for the fire of the beauty

we pass over sand castles, and the air

does not support our body

we fall into the sea

soon we will walk across the Atlantic.

 

(To Billy Collins)

 

J.T.Parreira

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This poem has an otherworldy feel, especially at the end:

... the air

does not support our body

we fall into the sea

soon we will walk across the Atlantic.

I like how you use punctuation within the lines, and how the linebreaks themselves serve as punctuation, where necessary. Well done.

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Yes that what Tony noted I agree at all. I noticed the same thing and it is well done.

 

I love it how fast goes this poem.

 

Aleksandra

The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth - Jean Cocteau

History of Macedonia

 

 

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  • 1 year later...

Funny how you have overridden my preferences for a different type of line break. Too bad there is no way I can out this in a special record of those poems that I could wish to be available for instant hearing as I go through my oh so too ordinary a day. Great write!

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We wait to cross the crowd

on the beach, we cross arms

photographic legs, breasts

raised for the fire of the beauty

we pass over sand castles, and the air

does not support our body

we fall into the sea

soon we will walk across the Atlantic.

 

(To Billy Collins)

 

J.T.Parreira

 

JT this reminds me of how compact and yet evocative your writes were. I hope to read some new material soon!

 

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We wait to cross the crowd

on the beach, we cross arms

photographic legs, breasts

raised for the fire of the beauty

we pass over sand castles, and the air

does not support our body

we fall into the sea

soon we will walk across the Atlantic.

 

(To Billy Collins)

 

J.T.Parreira

 

Yes, yes! What Tony said... most certainly. A classic vacation photo is now pinned in my mind with such elegance. I especially like... oh nevermind, I especially like all of it and cannot choose one line over the other.

 

~Rachel

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JT this reminds me of how compact and yet evocative your writes were. I hope to read some new material soon!

 

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I'm sorry to report that JT Parreira (along with pawn shop and three or four others) never logged in to the old board to receive their invitation pm's to this board; they're still in my out box there. I'll see if we can reach a few of them by email.

 

Tony

Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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