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Poetry Magnum Opus

When walk the trees


Omar

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This is a prose poem  (more like poem but no meter)

Tangled, dusty, unclear
a million colors--apple leaves--
lots of thoughts, too much delicacy,
thin like the air in April.
So much violet fantasy,
too many petals in the street...
When emotions become a person,
when the light becomes everything
and the eyes blind the ears,
these are the days when walk the trees.

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I like how this poem makes me feel. It's like I'm standing somewhere on a windy day with the trees swaying around me. I don't fly away, but I am transported nevertheless. 

You have a lovely way of expression: "lots of thoughts" blended with "too much delicacy" and "too many petals in the street." Exquisite. 

Thin like the air in April is remarkably palpable in this poem, because you don't say where in the world it's April. But it's not necessary or desirable to know where; it doesn't matter where, because that's how I picture the air in April. And that's why I'm able to feel it.

I love this poem.

Tony

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Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic

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Hi Omar,  This poem is what I would categorize as Free Verse but no matter what category one would assign, bottom line it is poetry.

On 8/31/2021 at 1:53 AM, Omar013 said:

too much delicacy,
thin like the air in April.

I, like Tony, found these lines lingering.  They oddly transformed me to Spring for a moment.  They actually confused me a bit because I felt Autumn as the season at present in the piece.  "apples"  leaves "tangled, dusty, unclear, a million colors"   I live in apple country with orchards near by,  I find autumn my favorite season to walk among the trees.  

Thank you for sharing this, I really enjoyed the read.

~~Tinker 

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~~ © ~~ Poems by Judi Van Gorder ~~

For permission to use this work you can write to Tinker1111@icloud.com

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  • 3 weeks later...
David W. Parsley

Welcome to the Forum, Omar.  And thanks for this freshly imagined introduction.  I, too, am struck by the writer's discovery of commonalities between Spring and Autumn: colored leaves become fallen petals waded by the trees and strewn out to the street; there is a similar thinness to the air.  Wonderful.

Thanks,
 - David

P.S.  I agree with Tinker. The structure and movement seem to indicate Free Verse, rather than Prose Poem.  I like it.

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  • 1 month later...

@Tinker thanks so much for your commentary, I understand your confusion. The thing is I am not really describing a scene but rather a collection of feelings that all come at the same moment to me ,as the autumn leaves and their colors, the breeze of April, the petals ,they all are existing at the same time. And thanks for letting me know that this kind of writing is free verse poetry. Can't wait to learn from you too.

Thanks again 

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