tonyv Posted June 12 Share Posted June 12 I am nothing with you, everything without you nothing out of you Broiler - Wild eyes (Cavego remix) Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_con Posted June 12 Share Posted June 12 Fantastic Tony! Short, sweet, perfect 1 Quote thegateless.org Come on over and check out my poetry substack y'all;-) Or if your bored, head to the Zazzle store: https://www.zazzle.com/store/gateless. If you buy anything I lose a bet, so consider that before you violate the digital rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David W. Parsley Posted June 12 Share Posted June 12 Another daring 5-7-5 composition. Visceral and apparently simple. Except it isn't simple! "You can't do with them and you can't do without them," comes to mind. - Dave 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikejewett Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 Nice Haiku here! The last line really brings it together so well, and it was unexpected, which I quite like. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted June 13 Author Share Posted June 13 On 6/12/2022 at 5:47 PM, dr_con said: Fantastic Tony! Short, sweet, perfect Juris, I'm always grateful for your positive encouragement -- thank you! On 6/12/2022 at 5:55 PM, David W. Parsley said: Another daring 5-7-5 composition. Visceral and apparently simple. Except it isn't simple! "You can't do with them and you can't do without them," comes to mind. - Dave Dave, thank you! I like how you've characterized this: apparently simple, yet not. 23 hours ago, mikejewett said: Nice Haiku here! The last line really brings it together so well, and it was unexpected, which I quite like. And Mike, thank you also! I don't know that this rises to the level of a haiku (other than in syllable count), but it's probably the closest I'll ever get to one! And I'm glad you picked up on the last line; I saw it like that myself but wasn't sure anyone else would. Tony Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badger11 Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 Neatly done Tony. Class concluding line. best Phil 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted June 14 Author Share Posted June 14 Thank you, Phil. I was considering a more “witty” line — can’t even remember what it was now — but I then concluded it was just too clever, too much. This is what stayed. Tony 1 Quote Here is a link to an index of my works on this site: tonyv's Member Archive topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoelJosol Posted June 16 Share Posted June 16 What a puzzle for a poem! Quote "Words are not things, and yet they are not non-things either." - Ann Lauterbach Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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